So Many Ways to Say Goodbye
by firstadream
Summary: A series of one-shots all of which feature Hannah's permanent departure from Booth's life. And all of which feature B/B fluff in surplus. Enjoy!
1. Hospital

**This is going to be a series of one-shots all revolving around a different way in which Hannah leaves. For good. I hope ya'll enjoy this first installment! **

When Hannah pushed open the door to the hospital room and saw her boyfriend leaning over the hospital bed, his gaze intent on his partner's face, his eyes hopeful and devastated, she stopped in her tracks. The moment was so quiet and so intimate, that Hannah had the urge to turn around and close the door. But a small, apparently masochistic, part of her made her wait. Made her stay and watch as he raised her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. Watch as he murmured something to her, his face softening into a smile. Watch as he lifted his hand brushed the bangs away from her eyes, his fingers ghosting across the cut on her forehead.

"Seeley," she finally said, her voice quiet but hard as she announced her presence.

He leaned away from the bed as if he'd been caught doing something wrong and smiled at her. "Hey, babe," he said easily, opening his free arm (the one not anchored to his partner's hand) to her and returning her quick kiss on the lips. "Thanks for coming."

"Of course," she said, feeling her anger soften at his obvious joy in seeing her. "How is she?"

When his gaze returned to his partner's, his expression clouding, his eyes darkening, she wished she'd never asked the question. "She's stable, but the doctor said she won't be out of the woods until she wakes up."

"I'm sorry, Seeley," she said sincerely, resting a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"I should've been there," he murmured, his fingers reflexively squeezing around Brennan's. "I should've known he'd go after her."

"You couldn't have known," Hannah told him. "There was no way of seeing this coming. You did everything you could."

"I should've been there," he said again and she sensed the unspoken reason for his agitation. A year ago, he would've been with her. A year ago, he could've protected her for the simple reason that he would've been sitting in her living room. But now, because of _her _she had been alone. An easy target.

"It's not your fault, babe," she said, but he only shook his head and bowed forward, pressing their joined hands to his forehead. "Seeley…"

"You can go home, Hannah," he said quietly. "Or hang out in the waiting room with the others." He didn't look at her when he said it, but the choice was clear: leave or stay—either way, _I want to be alone with her_.

"Okay," she said. "I'll be just down the hall if you need me."

He didn't respond and she could tell that even before she closed the door, he was a million miles away, thinking that if this had been a year ago, his partner would be safe.

—BB—

By some cruel twist of fate, she was there when Brennan woke up. She had gone back to the waiting room and stayed there for hours, reading old issues of the _New Yorker _beside Cam as she dozed, Angela as she fretted and Hodgins and Sweets as they sat silently, grim expressions on their faces. Sometime in the middle of the night, she had returned to see if he'd eaten, to see if he'd slept, to see if he needed her and that's when it happened.

She'd been there two minutes when Brennan let out a soft moan. Booth immediately turned away from Hannah and stood from his seat, hovering over the bed. "Bones?" he whispered.

"Booth," she breathed, her voice soft and raspy. "Booth."

"I'm here, babe," he murmured and Hannah tried to ignore the stab of jealousy that radiated through her. "Just open your eyes. I'm right here."

She sighed and cracked open her eyelids and at that first hint of blue, Booth grinned. "Hey," he said, tears in his voice, undeniable devotion in his eyes.

"Hey," she returned, smiling. And the trust, the adoration in her gaze made Hannah ache. If she had doubted before, she didn't now. They _loved_ each other.

She slipped away, leaving the partners in peace.

—BB—

"I'm going to stay here with her," Booth said.

"Seeley, the doctors said she'll be fine and you need to rest."

He shook his head even before she stopped talking. "No, I'm staying with her. I don't want her to be alone."

"She won't be. You know that. Cam even offered to stay so you could—"

"I want to be here when she opens her eyes," he told her and it was clear this was a point that wouldn't be argued.

Hannah sighed and moved toward the door, but then turned back to him, her hand on the doorknob. "Seeley, if this is because you're feeling guilty…"

"This is _not _because I feel guilty," he said from his spot by her bed. "It's because—"

She held up her hand to cut him off. "It's okay, Seeley. I understand." _It's because you love her. _She opened the door and walked away.

—BB—

"Bones, you're shaking."

"I'm j-just a little chilly," she told him.

He tugged the blankets up around her chin, and pressed his hand to her flushed face. "God, Bones, you're burning up." He frowned, his brow creasing with worry. "Maybe I should get a nurse."

"It's a p-perfect n-normal symptom of shock, Booth," she said, giving him one of her patented eye rolls.

"Shock? Bones, you think you're in shock?" He was visibly panicked now and stood from his seat by her bed, fully intending on getting a nurse.

"Booth, sit d-down," she told him. "They already treated me for it. I just m-might be a little feverish and c-cold for a while. I lost a lot of blood."

"Oh, Bones," he murmured, his voice suddenly soft. He ran his fingers across her cheek and, on impulse, leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She closed her eyes at the unexpected touch, the air escaping her lips in a soft sigh. "I'm sorry I wasn't there."

"S'okay," she mumbled, eyes still closed.

"No," he whispered. "It's not."

She opened her eyes and looked at him. Studied his face. Saw the remnants of the fear he had felt. The _terror _that had gripped him when he got the call. "I'm okay, Booth," she assured him softly. "I'm okay now."

"You can't stop shivering," he pointed out.

She managed a shrug even under her bundle of blankets. "It'll pass."

"Is there anything I can do?"

She almost said "no". The lie was right there on her lips. It would've been so easy. But she didn't. Instead she just looked up at him, hoping that he would know, hoping that she wouldn't have to ask.

He nodded, a soft smile gracing his lips. "Okay," he murmured and eased down on the bed beside her.

She turned on her side and he wrapped his arm around her stomach, tugging her back into the warmth of his body. Almost immediately, he felt the shivering stop. Felt her relax back against him, the tension draining from her weary body. "Thank you, Booth," she breathed, feeling the heat of his palm against her stomach, the warmth of his breath on her neck.

"You're welcome, Bones."

—BB—

They were fast asleep in each other's arms and Hannah wanted to scream. She could take the lingering looks, the hand on her back, the hugs, the shadow of regret that crossed his face when he watched her. Even now, even here, she could deal with his worry, his late night vigil at her bedside. She was his partner, his best friend. But this, _this _was more. This was too much.

The look on his face—even in sleep—was one of complete contentment. His arms were around her, his hand pressed gently to her stomach, his head resting comfortably in the curve between her shoulder and neck. And her, the look on her face was nothing but trust and comfort. For the first time since Hannah had seen her lying in that hospital bed, her face had lost that edge of pain, that tinge of fear. They looked entirely peaceful, lying there, together. And Hannah didn't belong. Maybe she never had.

—BB—

Booth was awoken by a gentle hand on his arm. Groggily, he pulled Brennan closer. "Bones?" he mumbled.

"No, it's me."

Booth blinked as Hannah's face came into focus, frowning sadly down at him. "Hannah?" he said, his voice soft. "What is it?"

"Can I talk to you?" she asked gently.

He glanced down at Brennan, still sleeping quietly, and nodded. "Okay."

He eased himself off the bed, tucked the blankets back around his partner, and followed Hannah out into the hallway. "What's going on?" he said. "Is everything okay?"

She shook her head slightly. Lifted a hand to his cheek. Looked into his eyes, dark and still sleepy. "You're in love with her," she murmured. It didn't sound like an accusation.

He dropped his eyes to the ground. "I, um…"

"You don't have to say anything, Seeley."

He lifted his gaze to her face. He looked regretful. Of course of he did; she shouldn't have expected anything less. "I'm going to go, okay?" she told him. "And I don't want you to feel guilty. And I don't want you to worry."

"Hannah, I—"

"I know the way you are, Seeley," she said gently. "I know you'll hold this against yourself. I don't want you to. I want you to be happy."

He was silent. For one, fleeting moment, she thought he might fight her on it, but he didn't. "Okay," he said.

"Okay," she echoed, then turned and walked away from him.

—BB—

Brennan stirred slightly when Booth returned to the bed, taking his place behind her. "Where'd you go?" she mumbled sleepily.

"Nowhere," he breathed, pressing his lips, briefly, to her neck. "I'm not going anywhere."

She sighed softly and nodded, settling back against him. "Okay."

**Total cuteness. I love it.**

**I'll try and update this as much as often, but please don't be mad if there's a few days between chapters. School is crazy and busy, and, unfortunately, my writing suffers because of it. Please be patient with me!**

**Anywho, I hope ya'll enjoyed this. Review if you did. Or if you didn't. ;)**


	2. Tragedy

***Squees in delight* ****Um, YOU GUYS! Can I just say WOW? Thank you so much for all the positive feedback for this series. It makes me so happy. **

**So I already posted this one-shot a few weeks ago, but it fits the premise of this series so well that I wanted to post it again. I promise to post a new (as in never posted on FanFiction before) one-shot tomorrow. **

Booth heard the knock on his door and swung it open, expecting to see Hannah, but finding Brennan instead. He tried not to overanalyze the rush of happiness that coursed through him when he saw her face. "Hey, Bones," he said, furrowing his brow slightly. "You okay?"

She opened her mouth as if to answer and then closed it again. She crossed her arms over her chest, her gaze dropping to the floor. "Bones?" he murmured, moving closer to her. He rested his hand on her shoulder and felt her body tremble at the slight touch. "Bones, what is it?"

She shook her head slightly, curling in on herself. He realized that she was fighting with every fiber of her being not to fall apart on his doorstep. "Hey, Bones, c'mere," he murmured. He slipped his arms around her waist and pulled her body into his. She tensed at first, her palms pressed to his chest as if she would push him away, but a moment later she relaxed against him. He felt a deep shudder run through her as the walls came undone, crumbling to the ground.

She pressed her face into his chest, her fingers curling around his shirt. He could feel her tears seeping through the fabric, warm and wet against his skin. He gathered her closer, holding her up as she shook against him, the sadness slowly seeping out of her.

As the tears continued to stream down her face, she leaned more heavily against his body. She felt like she couldn't get close enough to him. She wanted to curl inside him and fall asleep. She didn't want to be in her own skin anymore. "Booth," she breathed, half moaning, half sobbing.

"Hey, you're okay, you're okay," he whispered softly, pressing his lips to her hair. "I won't let anything happen to you," he promised. "I'm here now, okay? I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

She nodded into his shirt and squeezed her eyes shut, letting the rise and fall of his chest, the steady beating of his heart, lull the tears away. "Thank you," she choked out, grateful that he wasn't questioning her sudden presence, sad and broken, in his apartment.

She didn't know how long they stood there. Time passed in the strangest way for her as she stood there in his arms. All she knew was that he didn't leave and that being in his arms felt good and that she didn't even mind the occasional pressure of his lips against her forehead. At some point, the tears stopped, but still he didn't move away. "I'm so tired, Booth," she admitted, feeling her eyes droop, the tug of undeniable exhaustion.

"I know," he murmured.

He moved away for a moment, but her momentary unease was once again replaced by a sleepy peacefulness when a second later he returned and scooped her into his arms. She turned her face into his chest as he carried her, cradled like a child, into his bedroom and gently set her down on the bed. She curled on her side, turning her face into a pillow that smelled like him, as he pulled the comforter up over her weary body. "Don't leave," she mumbled, already half-asleep.

"I won't," he promised. "I just need to make a call."

He walked out of the room and she found that without his comforting presence, she was unable to fall completely asleep. She drifted in and out of awareness, torn between exhaustion and grief. His voice drifted in from the other room. He sounded weary and a little annoyed. She heard him say "Hannah" a couple of times, his tone placating, and she realized with a twinge of guilt that she had infringed on his plans with her. She meant to say something about this when he returned, but by the time he reentered the room and eased himself onto the bed behind her, she was so grateful that she the words slipped from her mind.

He draped his arm around her waist, his hand warm and comforting against her stomach, and pulled her body back against his. "Go to sleep, Bones," he murmured into her ear. "I'll be here when you wake up. I promise."

She nodded, already drifting away, and pressed back against him, letting out a long breath before finally, mercifully succumbing to the darkness.

—BB—

When Brennan woke up the next morning, he was no longer beside her. She could hear him just outside the door, talking on the phone. "Hannah, look, I'm sorry, but she needed me. What am I supposed to do? She's my partner." He fell silent for a moment. She could hear him shifting restlessly, sense his frustration even through the wall. "What's that supposed to mean?" he demanded, his tone verging on exasperated as he rejoined the conversation. "Well, I don't know what to tell you." He was quiet again for a second and then: "Yeah, I guess you're right. Fine. I'll see you then. Bye." She heard the click of his phone as he snapped it shut, the curse mumbled under his breath, the long sigh. And then he was there, standing in the doorway.

When he lifted his gaze and found her looking at him, he paused, slightly startled. "Bones," he said. "You're awake." She nodded. "I'm sorry I wasn't here…I was just…I had to…"

"I'm sorry I ruined your plans with Hannah," she said, interrupting his stuttering apologies.

"What? No. Don't worry about that," he said hastily, waving it off with a flick of his wrist.

"You should've said something," she said, feeling suddenly awkward, lying there in his bed. "I didn't mean to mess up your whole evening."

"Bones," he said, his tone suddenly serious, stern almost. "Don't apologize. There was nowhere I'd rather be last night than here with you."

"Really?" she said, her voice soft.

He nodded and walked over to the bed, easing himself down beside her. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close and she let him. For once she didn't question the easy intimacy that flowed between them, the connection that she'd always fought against for the simple reason that it terrified her. But she was in a strange mood. She wasn't so scared anymore. "Am I more important than Hannah?" she asked as she pressed against him, marveling at how good it felt to be tucked against him like this, to feel every line, every dip and bend of his body.

He sighed and kissed her forehead, his lips hovering along her hairline for a long time. His anxiety was there in the way he held her a little too tightly, his body tense against hers. She could feel him struggling and she felt the exact moment when he gave in. "You are, Bones," he said, his voice tight. "You're the most important person in my life."

She swallowed hard. She wanted to tell him how important he was to her. She wanted to tell him that she'd come to him last night because she'd known he was the only person in the world that could've kept her from falling apart. "My dad's dead," she whispered.

He tilted his face down to hers. "What?"

"He's dead," she said again and her voice faltered this time, quavering slightly around the words.

"Bones," he breathed. "God, babe, I'm sorry." He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her against his body. "I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault, Booth," she whispered.

"I know, but it's what people say, Bones, okay? I'm sorry that your dad died. I'm sorry that you're sad. I'm sorry that I couldn't protect you from this."

"You can't protect me from everything, Booth," she pointed out, clinging to logic like it was her only lifeline.

"I can try," he said.

She tilted her head up to his. "You were the only one I wanted to see."

He smiled softly at her admission. Lifted a hand and traced the curve of her cheek with his finger. "I'm always here, Bones." His gaze was earnest. "I'll never let you fall."

She smiled, warmed by his words, and then, all at once, she remembered. She remembered picking up the phone and hearing Russ' voice, cracked and broken, reaching over hundreds of miles. She remembered hanging up and feeling numb and wanting Booth so badly that she could barely breathe. "He's gone, Booth," she breathed. "I'll never see him again. I'll never hear his voice again. I'll never…I'll never…" She trailed off, her breath catching in her throat. "God, how does that happen? How can he go from being my dad to being…remains?"

"Hey, Bones," he murmured, drawing her gaze back to his face. "He's not gone. Not completely. He's still there. In your heart, in your mind."

"No, Booth, he's gone," she insisted, her voice desperate. "He was gone the minute his heart stopped beating. He's not there anymore." It was what she had learned in college and grad school. It was what she saw everyday in the lab. It was all that she knew. She was a scientist. She couldn't change.

"No, Bones, he's not."

She lifted a teary gaze to his face. She shook her head. She couldn't do it. She couldn't see it. "How?" she asked.

He let out a long breath. "Close your eyes," he said softly. She gave a bewildered look, but complied. "Now think of Max," he told her gently. "Picture him in your mind. From those old Converses he used to wear to the skull and crossbones tie you gave him for Christmas last year. You got him in your head?" She nodded slightly. "Okay. Now picture his face. His smile, his wrinkles, the color of his hair. Think of his voice and his laugh. Think of how it felt when he rested his hand on your arm. Think of how it felt when he hugged you." As he spoke, she began to cry, the tears slipping silently from her eyes, but he didn't slow down. "Picture that song he used to play for you when you were little," he continued, his voice rough and comforting. "Think of that day when he came over for dinner and we all danced to Love Shack in your living room. Think of the science experiments he put together for Parker. Think of how proud he was when you got that super scientist award a couple years ago." He paused for a moment and pressed his lips to her tear-streaked cheek. "Can you see him, Bones?"

She opened her eyes and looked at him. "I can see him," she said, nodding.

He smiled at her, his eyes warm and loving. "See, Bones? He's not gone. He's there for you whenever you need him."

"How is that possible?" she asked wonderingly.

He shrugged. "It just is."

"Your logic is flawed."

"Doesn't mean it's not true."

She was quiet for a minute. Her eyes fell away from his face and drifted shut again. She shook her head slightly, her hands smoothing across his chest. "I feel him, Booth. I can feel him around me." She opened her eyes. "It's not possible," she said, almost to herself, but her voice was hesitant and tainted with doubt.

He didn't answer, just watcher her, kept his gaze steady on her face. His eyes were dark and filled with conviction. She shifted closer to him, her hands sliding up around his neck. He pulled her tight against his broad chest. His hand drifted upwards, along the curve of her hip, the dip of her waist and higher. His palm rounded against her ribcage, his thumb brushing the edge of her breast. She gave a little whimper of desire and draped her leg across his hip, desperate, suddenly, for his body.

Her dad was dead. Her dad was gone, a ghost in her memory, but Booth, Booth was alive. He was alive and he was here and he was the only man she'd ever loved. "Booth," she pleaded. There was an ache deep inside her that only he could reach.

"Bones." Her name came out on a groan. He slipped his hand under her shirt and traced the smooth contours of her bare skin. "God, Bones."

Her arms were tight around his neck. She shifted against him restlessly. She couldn't get close enough. "I need…" She didn't know what she needed. She needed him.

"I know," he soothed, his voice low and gentle. The movements of his hands slowed slightly. He ran his fingers across her back. Pushed her back against the bed and bent his head over her stomach. Pressed his lips to the smooth expanse of skin. She brushed her fingers through his hair and felt something flare inside her. He lifted his head and moved back up her body until their faces were level.

"We can't, Bones," he murmured, brushing the bangs away from her forehead. "I've never cheated on a woman and I'm not going to start now, even though leaving this bed, leaving _you_, might be the hardest thing I've ever had to do."

She shook her head slightly and pressed a hand to his chest, gripping the fabric of his shirt in a loose fist. "You're leaving?" The thought of being alone was almost unbearable.

"I don't have to go now," he said easily, settling back on the bed beside her and pulling her into his arms. "I won't go until you're ready."

—BB—

They stayed in bed almost all day. Brennan lay there in his arms, drifting in and out of a fitful sleep. Sometimes she woke up crying, sometimes she forgot that he was dead, but always, when she opened her eyes, Booth was there, and he didn't let her go. Sometime the next evening, her grumbling stomach stirred her from sleep and she realized she hadn't eaten anything since the night before. She opened her eyes and focused them on his face. "I'm starving," she said softly.

He smiled. "Me too."

She followed him out to the kitchen and watched as he pulled eggs, bread and bacon from the fridge, tossing them on the counter. She immediately reached for the eggs, pulling four from the carton. "Scrambled or fried?" she asked.

"Scrambled," he said, as he pulled a couple of pieces of bacon from the packaging.

"I agree," she said with a nod.

She grabbed a bowl from the cupboard and, one at a time, carefully tapped the eggs against the rim, cracking them into the bowl. "You're very good at that," he commented.

"It doesn't take a genius level IQ to crack eggs, Booth." She turned and grinned at him. "Although, I guess it doesn't hurt."

He chuckled as he placed a pan on the stove and turned on the heat. She mirrored his actions, setting her pan beside his. He began to cook his bacon, while she whipped the eggs, adding a bit of water to make them fluffy. When she poured them over the heated pan, they sizzled and popped. She reached for a spatula and slowly ran it through the eggs, losing herself in the simplicity of the task, the predictability of it. Add heat and the eggs will cook. Too much heat and they will burn. These were things she could count on, reactions she could explain. There were so many things that confused her, so many things that could not be measured and catalogued. She took comfort in the things that could.

Beside her, Booth flipped his bacon and adjusted the heat beneath them. When he glanced over at her, he found her lost in thought, her gaze distant, her brow furrowed. Without thinking, he moved behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She didn't pull away from him, didn't balk at the intimacy of his stance, only leaned back against his chest, letting him support her as she stirred the eggs. "I gotta confess something, Bones," he murmured, his chin resting on her shoulder.

"What's that?" she asked softly.

"I want to kiss you."

She smiled and closed her eyes, resting her hand against the arm that circled her waist. "So kiss me."

He was quiet for a while. She could feel his chest expanding and relaxing as he breathed. "I have to talk to Hannah."

She sighed and turned in his arms. "Then go," she murmured, smoothing her hands across his chest.

He studied her face carefully. "You sure?" She nodded. "What about breakfast?"

"We can eat when you get back."

He smiled and drew her close. She moved into him and let out a long breath. Felt his arms wind around her waist, his hands settling against her back. "Let's eat in bed," he whispered into her ear, his voice suddenly husky and deeper somehow.

She took a step back. "Deal."

—BB—

Booth had only been gone five minutes when Brennan heard a knock at the door. Thinking he'd forgotten his keys or wallet, she stood from the couch and opened the door. But instead of finding her partner on the other side, she found Angela. "Booth called me," Angela explained.

Brennan nodded and stepped aside so her friend could move past her into the living room. Brennan closed the door and turned around and was almost immediately accosted by Angela. "Oh, sweetie," she murmured, hugging her friend close. "I'm so, so sorry."

Remembering what Booth had explained to her, Brennan resisted the urge to point out that it wasn't her fault. "Thanks, Ange," she said instead.

Angela pulled away and studied her friend's face, as if checking it for any damage. "You're okay?" she prompted. "I mean, as okay as you can be?"

Brennan nodded. "Yes. I think I'm going to be fine."

Angela smiled, resisting the urge to ask exactly what had happened in this apartment, in _that _bedroom in the last twenty-four hours. "Look, sweetie, I want to be really supportive and everything, and I am, but this apartment smells like bacon and I have been having some _major _cured meat cravings since I got pregnant, so I'm just going to have to excuse myself for a sec."

Brennan watched, utterly bemused, as Angela disappeared into the kitchen, reappearing moments later holding a piece of bacon. "That's Booth's bacon," she said, a little indignant.

"He can make more," Angela said carelessly, finishing off her snack in about two bites. "Okay," she sighed, licking her fingers. "Now I can focus." She walked over and took Brennan's hand, leading her over to the couch. "Tell me everything."

Brennan did, obediently answering all of Angela's questions and by the end of the tale, her friend was practically squealing with delight. "Sweetie, I'm so proud of you!"

Brennan frowned. "But I didn't do anything."

"You were sad and you wanted Booth and for once you didn't fight it. You went to him and asked to be held. That's huge, Bren."

"It wasn't that I wanted him, Ange," Brennan said, shaking her head slightly. "I've wanted him before, but this was different. I just…I couldn't…" She sighed and let her gaze drift to the window that was slowly dimming as the sun went down. "I needed him," she murmured.

Angela smiled, feeling tears in her eyes. She reached out and rested her hand on her friend's arm, squeezing gently. "And that's okay. It's okay to need him sometimes."

Brennan nodded distractedly, her face still turned away. "I feel so strange," she admitted softly. "I'm not scared anymore, Ange. How does that happen? Yesterday, I was terrified of the prospect of a relationship with Booth and today I'm lying in his bed, wrapped up in his arms, wishing he would kiss me."

"Grief tends to do that, sweetie," Angela said softly. "It makes us reevaluate our lives and see what's really important."

"Booth is important," Brennan said steadily. "He's important to me." She looked at her friend. Her eyes were weary and serene and somehow softer than before. "How did I not see that before?"

"I think you saw it, but you just couldn't face it."

"I've missed so much," she said, a little forlornly.

"There's still time," Angela assured her. "You two have all the time in the world." She grinned. "Just don't waste it, okay?"

Brennan smiled, giving a definitive nod. "I won't."

—BB—

When Brennan heard him fumbling with his keys outside, she stood from her spot on the couch and crossed over to the door. As soon as the door swung open, she walked over to him and he immediately wrapped her in his arms, letting out a sigh into her hair. "Bones," he breathed, sounding tired and relieved.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Babe," he said, chuckling, "you're dad just died. I should be asking you that question."

She leaned back slightly, just enough so that she could see his face and narrowed her eyes slightly, her head tilted up towards his. "What?" he asked.

"You called me 'babe'," she said.

"Is that okay?" he asked hesitantly.

"Yes," she said, smiling softly. "I think it is."

"Good," he said, feeling inordinately pleased. Yesterday, she was Bones. His partner. His gorgeous, breathtakingly kind, brilliant partner who he shared the occasional guy hug with if he was lucky. Now she was Bones. His partner. His gorgeous, breathtakingly kind, brilliant partner who he could call "babe" and kiss whenever he liked. "Hey, Bones?" he breathed, suddenly aware in a way he hadn't been a second before of the feel of her body against his.

"Yes?" she whispered, sensing the shift in his mood.

"Can I kiss you now?"

"I'd like that very much."

"Good."

He drew her closer, his head bowing towards hers, so close that her face blurred, the pink of her lips melding with the cream of her skin and the blue of her eyes. He thought of that first kiss, the taste of tequila on her tongue, the promise of _somewhere. _He thought of kissing her beneath the mistletoe, her fingers curled around the lapels of his coat, her breath sweet minty. He thought of that last kiss, over a year ago now, that fleeting moment when she gave into him, her lips softening beneath his, before she wrenched them away, her palms pressed against his chest, her tortured, confused, terrified _no._

Now, as he pressed his lips to hers, he could feel those memories stirring in him. As he parted her lips, tasted her taste, felt her melt against him, her mouth supple and soft beneath his, he felt as if they had finally reached the _somewhere _that he'd promised her all those years ago.

She leaned into him, her hands slipping inside his jacket and around his waist. Tilted her head to the side. Slanted her mouth over his again and again. He groaned a very quiet groan and slipped his hands under the hem of the oversized collared shirt she was wearing, the shirt she'd stolen from his bottom drawer a couple hours ago. "I like this shirt on you," he mumbled into her lips.

She smiled, giving a little hum of agreement that quickly faded into a sigh as he moved his hands higher, over her waist and stomach. When he reached her breasts, his fingers brushing along the lacy cups of her bra almost shyly, she bowed her head away from his lips and arched into him. "Bedroom?" he murmured, already bending down to sweep her into his arms.

"Please," was her breathless answer.

He grinned down at her flushed face and carried her to his bed, lowering her onto the rumpled sheets. He pulled off his t-shirt and stepped out of his jeans, before lying down beside her. She turned into his body and found his lips again, kissing him softly. "Thank you, Booth," she whispered.

"For what?"

"For never letting me fall."

He smiled and pressed his lips to her forehead. She sighed, feeling a deep peace settle inside her, just because he was here and he loved her and they were alive with all the time in the world left to go.

**I love reviews!**


	3. Proposal

**Okay, I know I said this wouldn't be up until tomorrow, but I finished early! Yay!**

The knock came in the middle of the night. Brennan woke up almost instantly, a surge of adrenaline pushing her up and off the bed within seconds. She swung open the door and found him, right there on her doorstep.

"Booth."

"I asked her to marry me."

She swallowed. "Do you want to come in?"

He walked past her without looking at her eyes and stood facing the opposite wall. "She accepted," he announced.

She crossed her arms over her chest and fought against the sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. "Congratulations," she said. The words felt like gravel in her mouth, scraping up her throat and over her tongue.

He turned to her and was in front of her in two quick strides. "You don't mean that," he accused.

"Yes," she said, "I do."

"No, you don't" was his instant contradiction. "I know you, Bones," he said, moving closer. "I _know_ you. This is killing you, standing here, congratulating me on being in love with another woman."

"You don't know me, Booth." Her voice was calm, steady. "You haven't known me for a long time."

The words fell like a weight against his chest. "I know you," he said, but his voice was softer now. "I _knew _you," he amended, because she was right. He didn't know her anymore, not really. Not in the intimate, aching way he used to. "I _loved _you," he breathed roughly. "God, I loved you so much."

He was so close now. Close enough that she could smell him and feel the heat of his body and hear the rough way he was breathing. "I think I loved you, too," she said, the admission slipping from her lips after years of holding it in.

"_Bones_…_"_

She closed her eyes at the name. Her name. The one he gave to her. "What are you doing here, Booth?"

He didn't answer her. He lifted his hands and rested them on her arms. Trailed them down to her elbows and back up over her shoulders. Pushed his fingers into her hair and tilted her head back. Bowed his head forward and pressed his lips to the hollow of her throat.

Her eyes slid shut. Her hands smoothed across his chest. "God, Booth," she moaned. "Please, don't do this to me."

He stilled at her words, but she gripped his shoulders, because she could feel him now and she hadn't been able to feel him so long. His stubble was rough against her neck, but his lips were soft, his kisses warm. And she loved him. There was that. She always had that.

"Bones." He whispered her name across her skin. Lifted his head and looked into her eyes.

"Just…" She trailed off. Shook her head. She missed him _so _much. "Just hold me, please? I want to remember what it's like." _I want to have you, just for a moment, before you're gone again._

He nodded silently and pulled her closer. Settled his arms around her waist. She pressed her face into his chest and breathed in deeply. He smelled just the same. Felt just the same.

She missed him so much.

His hands were tracing circles across her back. She could feel the heat of his palms through the thin fabric of her t-shirt. "How long have you had this?" he asked quietly, referencing the FBI shirt she was wearing.

She smiled softly. "Do you remember that night when we decided to walk home from the park and it was raining and we sprinted back here and—"

"And you gave me that 'Science is Cool' t-shirt that you'd gotten at a conference, because mine was soaking wet."

She nodded. "I kept your shirt. I...I meant to give it back. I washed it and dried it, but I…" _But then you found Hannah and it was all I had left of you._

"Don't worry about it, Bones," he murmured into her hair. "You keep it. It looks better on you anyway." She smiled and pressed closer to him. He tightened his arms around her. "Do you want to know a secret?" he asked her.

"Sure," she said softly, lulled by his presence, his arms, his voice.

"I kept your shirt, too."

It was nothing really. It was a shirt. It was one night, a long time ago. But something in his voice—the sincerity, the memory, made her breath catch. "You did?"

"Yes," he admitted. "I kept it because…because it was yours." _And it was all I had left of you. _"It was squinty and nerdy and you all over. It smelled like you for a long time. Not anymore, but…"

He trailed off and she tensed in his arms. Pulled back slightly. "Booth?"

"Yes."

"Don't marry her."

He stared at her. He watched her. They stood there, looking at each other, for a long time. She could hear the clock ticking on the wall. The hum of the refrigerator. The thud of her own heart and this fact, this thing that she had—that she loved him.

He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She tilted her head up and his lips brushed across her nose, her cheek, the corner of her mouth. "Okay," he breathed, close enough to kiss. "I won't."

—BB—

The sun was rising when he came back. He found her in her bedroom, asleep on top of the comforter. She opened her eyes when he walked in and stood at the foot of her bed. She watched him as he shrugged out of his jacket, stepped out his shoes, pulled off his shirt and pants. She watched him as he lowered himself onto the bed and moved up towards her, pressing kisses to her ankles, her knees, her thighs, her stomach, her neck. "You're back," she said simply, arching into his touch as he trailed his hand up her side, his thumb brushing the edge of her breast.

"I'm back," he confirmed.

He gripped the edge of his old t-shirt and pulled it over her head. Drew her warm, naked body against his. "I missed you," he breathed into her lips.

She smiled. "I missed you, too."

**Adorable much? I really liked writing this one. I think that really, all Brennan would have to do is tell Booth she loves him and he'd be there in a heartbeat. Sure, he loves Hannah. But he loves Bones so much more. Hannah's just a rebound, a fill-in because the woman he truly loves is a wee bit emotionally retarded. (Sorry, Bones, but it's kinda true.) **

**I hope it won't take something like him proposing for her to see the light, but you never know… Anywho, REVIEW please!**


	4. Choice

**Another break-up. More fluff. Enjoy.**

"Can I ask you something?"

Booth eyed the three empty beer bottles in front of him, before throwing Cam a wry smile. "Sure, why not?"

"If you had to choose between Hannah and Brennan, who'd you pick?"

He immediately tensed at the question, leaning away from her and signaling the bar tender for another drink. "What kind of a question is that?" He tried to keep his tone light but he had a feeling he wasn't going to enjoy this conversation.

Cam shrugged. She'd never shied away from making him squirm. "I don't know. It just seems like, right now, you have the best of both worlds."

Booth felt an uneasy feeling creep into the pit of his stomach. "What do you mean?" he asked, not meeting her eye.

She shrugged again and took a sip of wine. "Well, you spend all day with Bones, laughing, solving crimes, hanging out at the diner. Then you go home and you have Hannah for the romance and the sex—"

"Cam!"

"I'm just saying, Seeley, you're practically dating two women."

"Except I'm not. I'm only dating one. Bones and I are just friends. She's free to date whoever she wants." He believed what he was saying, but somehow the words rang hollow—even to his own ears.

"Seeley," she muttered, rolling her eyes like he was the biggest idiot on the planet.

"What?" he asked.

"You know that's not true."

"What? The part about me and Bones being friends? You of all people should know that most definitely _is _true."

The bitterness in his tone was not lost on her, but she forged ahead anyway. "No, the part about Brennan being free to date whoever she wants."

He frowned. Shrugged. Sipped his beer. "Well she is, isn't she?"

"Technically yes," she replied, her gaze steady and knowing—_too _knowing—on his face. "She doesn't though. She hasn't gone on a date since she got back from Maluku."

"And that's my fault somehow?"

Cam sighed and turned away from him. "A relationship with no sex."

"What?"

"That's what Angela called it. A relationship with no sex."

"Look, Cam—"

"All I'm saying Seeley, is you might want to figure out where your priorities are."

"My priorities?"

"Seeley," she said, her voice softening slightly. "You already know the answer to this."

He swallowed hard, his eyes fixed steadily on his beer bottle. "I do?" he questioned quietly.

"I'd say you've known for about seven years."

—BB—

It scared him how easily he made the choice. _Hannah or Bones? _Cam had asked and his mind had chosen before he could even process the question. _Bones, _it said quietly, steadily. _Bones, of course. It's always been Bones. _

That night at dinner, as he listened to Hannah complain about her boss and her boring day in the office, he thought of Bones. He thought of the way his whole body warmed when she smiled at him, and the way his own tears rose to the surface when she cried. He thought of the thrill he got when she lay her hand on his arm, the way his whole being, for just a moment, revolved around the brush of her fingers in the crook of his arm. _Bones, _he thought quietly. _It's always been Bones._

"Hannah," he said quietly, interrupting her ranting.

"Yes?"

"I, um…I was just wondering." He lifted his eyes from his dinner plate to her face. "Do you love me?"

She frowned and let out a confused, half-chuckle. "What's this about, Seeley?"

"Do you love me?" He said it again, slower this time, steadier.

She nodded, and said, "Of course, I do," but even as the words left her mouth her brow was creasing with doubt.

"Do you think about me?" he asked.

Her frown deepened. She set her fork down beside her plate. "Do I think about you?" she repeated.

"Yeah," he said easily like they were discussing a case or the weather. "Like when you're at work or at the grocery store or jogging in the park, do you think about me?"

She shrugged. Her eyes shifted away from his face. "Yeah, sometimes," she murmured softly. Her gaze was distant. "Do you think about me?"

He smiled, a little sadly. "No," he admitted. "I don't."

She nodded. She didn't seem all that surprised. He watched as she lifted her napkin from her lap and carefully folded it on the table, before standing up and walking around the table to him. "I know, Seeley."

"You do?" he asked, suddenly feeling guilty, suddenly remembering that he did love her in some way.

"Yes," she told him gently, lifting a hand to his cheek. "Do you think I didn't know?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "I…I hope you knew—I hope you _know_—that I did love you. I hope you could at least see that."

She nodded. "I did," she assured him.

He nodded too and dropped his gaze to his lap. She smiled and leaned forward, pressing a light kiss to his cheek. "You're a good man, Seeley Booth," she murmured and walked out the door.

—BB—

He tracked her down in the bone room, identifying the remains of World War I soldiers. "Jeez, Bones, don't you ever sleep?"

She barely glanced up at his sudden presence beside her at midnight on a Saturday. "I've been having trouble sleeping lately," she told him frankly and he had to wonder if it had something to do with him, with the way their relationship had changed.

He smiled slightly, but she was too engrossed in her bones to notice. "Me too," he admitted softly, stepping behind her and peering over her shoulder, watching as her careful fingers traced a bullet hole in the skull she held.

She didn't comment on his admission. Still, she didn't even look at him. "What are you doing here, Booth?" she finally asked. She could feel the heat from his body through her lab coat.

"I just…I wanted to…" He trailed off and shook his head, leaning away from her. "I wanted to tell you that I…I choose you."

She stilled. He saw her body grow tense. She put down the skull and turned around, lifting her eyes to his face. He wondered if his vague statement was totally lost on her. "You choose me?" she asked softly and he could see that, in some way, she understood what he meant.

"Always, Bones," he promised. "I always choose you."

He watched as her eyes filled with tears, as her lips parted, her breath catching in her throat. "So you…" She bowed her head forward and he moved closer. "So you…" She couldn't bring herself to ask.

"So," he murmured and she lifted her hands to rest against his chest. "So I love you, Bones."

She leaned into him and he slipped his arms around her waist. Pressed his lips to her forehead. "Why did you leave?" she breathed, the words muffled in his shirt, and he knew she wasn't talking about Afghanistan.

He sighed. "You broke my heart, Bones."

A shudder ran through her body at the words. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault," he told her. And it wasn't. "I asked for too much. I expected too much."

She looked up at him. "I do love you," she said, her gaze bright and intent on his face. "In some way, I do. Even though I can't measure it or prove it or analyze it, I know I do."

"You do?"

She smiled. "I learned that from you."

"I taught you how to love?"

"You helped me remember how."

He pulled her closer. "Oh, Bones," he murmured. He bowed his head forward and pressed a feather-light kiss to her lips. "My Bones," he breathed and felt her melt into him.

"My Booth," she returned.

He nodded and kissed her nose. "Always."

**Thank you again for all the wonderful feedback. I know every author on FanFiction says this, but it truly does make me want to write more when I know what I post is being read and enjoyed. So… REVIEW! :)**


	5. Dreams

**More fluff! **

As soon as Hannah saw the doctor step into the waiting room, she was up from seat and striding over to him within seconds. "How is he?" she asked anxiously. "Is he okay?"

The doctor nodded, a little distractedly, and glanced at his pager. "Yes. Agent Booth is stable and doing well." He looked up at her and smiled. "He should make a full recovery within a couple weeks."

She nodded gratefully, feeling fresh tears—relieved tears—fill her eyes. "Can I see him?"

"He's still a little groggy, but you can head on back," he said already turning away.

"Thank you!" Hannah called to his retreating form as she hurried down the hall.

She pushed open the door to his room and quickly moved to his side, lifting his hand and pressing her lips to his knuckles. "Seeley?" she murmured, resting a hand against his pale face. "Seeley, can you hear me?"

He groaned quietly, turning into her hand, his body shifting on the bed. "Seeley?" she said again, leaning closer to him, her voice soft and encouraging.

"Uh," he groaned. His fingers tightened around hers. "Bones…"

Hannah leaned away from him as if burned. "What?" she said and her voice had lost all its softness.

He was still out of it, groggy from the drugs and the blood loss. He opened his eyes and blinked at the light. "Bones?" he breathed again, gripping Hannah's hand like it was his lifeline.

"No, Seeley," she said. "It's me. It's Hannah."

His grip loosened at her words. He let out a long breath, his eyes drooping shut again. "Where's Bones? Where is she?"

She pulled her hand from his feeble grip. "She's in Atlanta for a conference," she told him roughly. "She's flying back now."

He was almost gone now, slipping away fast, pulled back under by the morphine. "Bones…" Her name was a sleepy sigh, drifting from his lips as he fell asleep.

—BB—

Hannah pushed open the door and found Booth sitting up in bed, his bandaged leg stretched out before him. When he saw her, he smiled. "Hey, babe," he said softly, his voice still a little thick.

"Hey," she said, coming to a stop at the foot of his bed.

He gave her a slightly confused look. "What are you doing down there?" he asked.

She shrugged and looked at her feet. "Nothing," she mumbled.

"What's wrong?" he asked, too tired to even pretend to buy her denials.

She shrugged again. "You just…" She lifted her head and met his gaze. "You said Temperance's name when you were all groggy and drugged up."

"I did?"

She nodded. "You wanted her not…" She trailed off and dropped his gaze again. "Not me."

He sighed and reached out a hand towards her. "Hannah," he said softly. "C'mere." She looked at him, her eyes doubtful. "Come on," he said again. "Don't make a wounded man beg."

She smiled at that and grudgingly moved into his reach. "Bones and I—we go way back," he said, taking her hand. "I've known her forever. Asking for her is just a testament to how long we've been friends. And anyway," he said, his voice softening, "you shouldn't listen to anything I say when I'm on morphine. Bones said I asked to speak to JFK when I was waking up from brain surgery."

"Really?" she asked.

He nodded. "Really."

—BB—

Brennan rushed out of the airport and jumped into the first cab she saw, breathlessly rattling off the address of the hospital Hannah had given her over the phone. They arrived a scant thirty minutes later and she ran inside, dragging her suitcase behind her. She hurried over to the receptionist desk and practically accosted the nurse. "Seeley Booth," she said. "I'm looking for Special Agent Seeley Booth. He's…He's my partner. What room is he in?"

The nurse behind the desk typed something into the computer. Clicked the mouse a couple times before looking up at Brennan, her expression apologetic. "I'm sorry, but Agent Booth checked himself out over an hour ago."

—BB—

"Booth, I really think I should stay. The doctor was really annoyed that you checked yourself out yesterday."

"Hannah," Booth said softly. "I'm fine. I have movies, comic books…" He lifted the pill bottle resting beside him and gave it a shake. "…pain meds," he added with a grin.

She smiled too, reluctantly. "I know. I just…"

"Hannah, I'm fine," he assured. "Go to work. Break some rules. I'll be okay."

—BB—

The knock came in the middle of the morning news and despite himself, Booth felt his heart rate surge. "Come in!" he called.

The door opened immediately, but Brennan didn't move from the doorway. She looked a little frantic, a little pissed off, and _very_ sleep deprived. "You checked yourself out of the hospital." It sounded like an accusation.

He shrugged. "They patched me up, gave me some pain meds…" He trailed off, not meeting her eye. "I'm pretty much good to go."

She took a step into the room. Just one, but it was something. "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you call?"

"I was a little busy getting a bullet removed from my thigh, Bones," he mumbled, letting a little of his frustration seep into his tone.

For a moment, she was silent, regarding him. He suddenly felt very far away from her. "I'm not your emergency contact anymore, am I?"

He looked down at his lap and shook his head. "No, I…I changed it a couple weeks ago."

"To Hannah." It wasn't a question.

He nodded. He wanted to apologize for something, but he didn't know what. "To Hannah," he confirmed. He swallowed and looked away from her face again. He couldn't bear to see the hurt that flashed through her eyes. "Maybe you should go, Bones," he suggested softly.

"You want me to go?"

_No. _"Yes."

She sighed. Took a step back. Paused. "Did I do something?"

_Yes. _"No."

"Booth…"

"Please," he breathed, "just go."

"Are you angry with me?"

He closed his eyes. "Bones…"

"What did I do?"

He turned towards her. "I said your name."

She frowned. "You said my—"

"In the hospital, after my surgery, I was calling out for you. I wanted _you_, Bones, but you weren't there."

"Booth, I'm—"

"Why can't you just…just get out of my head?" His voice was raw, desperate. "Why won't you let me move on?"

She shook her head, her eyes brimming with tears. "I'm not trying to stop you," she said softly.

"Do you know what I told her? Do you know what I told Hannah?" She shook her head weakly. "I made up some bullshit about calling out to JFK when I was waking up from my coma, but we both know that's not true. I called out to _you_ after my brain tumor, because I was in lovewith _you_."

She swallowed and swiped the tears from her cheeks. "I should go…"

"I don't want to love you anymore," he breathed raggedly. He was crying too. "I can't go through that again. It hurt, Bones. It hurt so much. And I thought I loved Hannah; I though I was in love with her, but it's you, Bones, it's always been you. When I'm scared, _you're_ the one I want. When I'm hurt, I want _you _to hold my hand. Even my dreams want you, Bones. That's how deep you run in me."

She was silent and still in his doorway. He watched her, his eyes sad and dark. "Do you think it's easy for me, seeing you with Hannah?" she asked quietly. He didn't answer and she didn't wait for him. "When I thought Russ had died, who did I turn to for comfort? When Zach was gone, whose shoulder did I rest my head on? When I was…" She broke off and sucked in a ragged breath. "When I was buried underground, scared and alone, who did I…"

"Bones…"

She looked away. "I wrote a letter to you."

"What?"

"Hodgins, he…he wrote a letter to Angela, to tell her he loved her. And I…I wrote a letter to _you_, Booth."

"You did?"

She nodded. Met his eye. "I dream about you, too."

"You do?"

She smiled at him then, and her face suddenly softened. The fear was gone, the panic, the anger. "Of course I do," she whispered and within seconds, he was struggling to his feet, limping over to where she stood.

"Bones," he murmured, smiling. "C'mere."

She moved into his open arms. Circled her arms around his waist. Rested her head on his chest. "You shouldn't be standing," she informed him, her voice muffled in his shirt.

"I wanted to hold you," he told her, pressing his cheek to her hair.

"I would've come to you."

"You've come far enough."

She lifted her head and looked into his face. "So is this it?" she asked hesitantly. "Are we…"

"You're my girl," he said, pressing his lips to her forehead. "And I'm your guy. Got it?"

She nodded. "Got it."

**So I really liked this one, and I hope ya'll did too. I know there's no explicit break up scene, but I think it's pretty obvious that it's headed in that direction. Review please! And if you have any suggestions about ways to get rid of Hannah, please let me know. I've already gotten a few that were really interesting!**


	6. Stay

**More Hannah-less fluff, as ordered. Thanks so much to Lady-josie for this idea!**

"Hey, Dad? Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, buddy."

"Why don't we hang out with Bones anymore?"

Booth froze at the question, hamburger poised in the air half way to his mouth. "Um." He cleared his throat awkwardly. "What do you mean, bub?"

Parker shrugged, halfheartedly pushing his spaghetti around on his plate. "You know," he said. "She just used to be around more. Like when we'd go over to her apartment and she'd make macaroni and cheese for us. Or when we'd go to the diner for ice cream after you and her picked me up from school. Or when she'd come to my soccer games." He shrugged again, looking sad. "I don't know. I just miss her."

Booth let out a long breath, feeling an inexplicable ache take up residence in his chest. "Bones and I are still friends," he said lamely, because it was all he could think to say.

Parker fixed him with a knowing gaze that seemed wise beyond his years. "It doesn't seem like it. Now you're always with that other lady."

"Her name's Hannah, Parker, remember?"

"Yeah," he mumbled. "Right. I mean, she's nice and all, but I liked Bones more. Can't she go back to being your girlfriend?"

"Parker," Booth said gently, "Bones was never my girlfriend."

The little boy frowned, his brow furrowing in confusion. "I don't think so," he said. "You did all the same stuff with her as you do with the new lady, and she's your girlfriend, right?"

"All the same stuff?" Booth shook his head. "No we didn't. C'mon, Parks, don't be silly."

"Dad," Parker said, rolling his eyes at his dad. "Do I have to list them again? Macaroni, ice cream, soccer games. Plus you stared at her a lot and talked about her _all _the time and pretty much took every opportunity to touch her." He paused in his analysis suddenly and cocked his head to the side. "Well, you actually don't do those last things with the new lady so much, so maybe you're right. Maybe Bones wasn't your girlfriend."

Booth frowned at his son as he went back to eating his spaghetti. "I stare at Hannah and talk about her, don't I?"

Parker shook his head. "Nope. Definitely not."

Booth was flabbergasted. A half-hearted "Oh" was all he could muster.

"Dad?" Parker asked, eyeing his father warily. "Dad? You okay?"

Booth shook his head slightly. "Yeah, um… yeah. Why?"

"You just got really quiet is all."

"I'm fine, bud," Booth said, forcing a smile onto his face. "Eat your dinner."

—BB—

It was late when he appeared in the doorway of her office. The lab was dark and empty and quiet. So quiet that she could hear him breathing. "Booth," she said. "What are you doing here?"

He shrugged and moved into her office, taking a seat on her couch. "I just…I just wanted to talk."

"Okay," she said warily. "About what?"

"Parker misses you," he said without preamble. "He wants us to be boyfriend and girlfriend again."

"But we were never—"

"He thinks we were."

"Oh," she said softly.

"And he won't say Hannah's name. He just…he won't." He looked at her, his gaze so intent, so dark, that she had to force herself not to look away. "And he notices things. He notices that I don't look at Hannah the way I look at you. He notices that I don't talk about her the way I talk about you."

"Well, maybe he just needs more time to—"

"No, Bones!" Booth cried, slamming his fist against her coffee table. "Do you not understand what I'm trying to say? Can you not see what I'm trying to tell you?" She shook her head. "I'm trying to tell you that even my ten-year-old son gets it."

"Gets what?"

"Gets how much I _love _you. He thought you were my girlfriend. He thought we were dating and you know what? We basically were." He could see her jaw tensing, see the denial on the tip of her tongue and he rushed on before she could get it out. "We spent all our time together. We talked late at night. We ate dinner together. Sometimes we even fell asleep on this very couch and slept side by side. We did everything we could, went as far as we dared, without calling it dating."

"Angela called it a…a relationship without sex."

He nodded. "It was," he said bluntly. "And I couldn't do it anymore. I needed that connection, Bones. I wanted you so much—it took every ounce of self-control I had not to put my hands all over you, because it mattered more to me just to have you near. But…" He trailed off. His face was earnest. "But when I love a woman, I need to love her emotionally _and _physically."

Despite herself, she could feel her body respond to his words and the way her eyes darkened was not lost on him. He stood from his spot on the couch and walked over to where she was standing, arms crossed, expression stoic. "Sometimes, when I was with Hannah, I pictured you." His words floated across the air between them, intimate and raw. "I imagined the scent of vanilla was really lavender. Imagined the eyes staring into mine were indigo not sky blue. Imagined that the hair tumbling through my fingers was auburn not blonde."

She let out a sigh and the sound was loud in the silence. "You did?" she breathed. He nodded. "But you love Hannah."

"Sure, I love Hannah. I love Parker. I love Pops. I love Cam and Angela and Sweets when he's not being obnoxious and Hodgins when he's not spouting conspiracy theories. But you, Bones…" He trailed off. Lifted his hand pushed his fingers into her hair. Moved into her until he could feel the outline of her body against his. "_Christ._"

He pushed her backwards until she met the edge of her desk and then reached down, gripping the backs of her thighs and lifting her onto the cool glass surface. She immediately wrapped her legs around his waist, locking his body against hers. "I need you," he told her. "That's the difference. I need you, Bones. I don't think I need anyone the way I need you."

He dipped his head and pressed a line of open-mouthed kissed up her neck to the underside of her jaw. "Do you need me?" he asked raggedly.

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pressing her lips to the spot behind his ear. "I need you," she said. "I need you and it scares me."

He sighed and ran his hands up her back, smoothing his palms across the warm planes. "Don't fight it, Bones. Please, don't fight it."

She looked into his eyes and knew that she trusted him more than anyone. "Stay with me?" she murmured.

He nodded. "Of course, Bones." He kissed her cheek and her nose and her lips. "There's nowhere else I'd rather be."

**Yay! Sexual tension! Total party. Let me know what you think!**


	7. Football

**Sorry I've been MIA for a while, but here's some more fluff to warm us this holiday season. :)**

"Okay!" Parker announced loudly, leaping up from the blanket. "It's time to pick teams for football." He paused for about half a second, before declaring, "I call Bones!"

"Hey," Booth said, not missing the way Hannah's face fell, "what about your old man?"

"Oh, um, sorry," Parker said, not looking like he cared at all. "C'mon, Bones! Let's go practice."

Brennan grinned as the little boy charged over and grabbed her hand, hauling her off to plan out their game strategy. Once they were out of earshot, Booth scooted over to Hannah and slipped his arm around her waist. "You okay?" he asked, pressing a kiss to her temple.

"Yeah," she said quickly, not meeting his eye. "I just wish he liked me more."

"He likes you," he insisted for the fiftieth time that day.

Hannah shook her head slightly, her gaze drifting over to where Parker was standing with Brennan, animatedly explaining something to her. "Not as much as Temperance," she said quietly.

"He's known Bones forever," Booth said. "They've got this weird bond over science and squinty stuff. I wouldn't get worked up over it."

—BB—

"Blue forty-two! Blue forty-two! Hut, hut, hike!"

Parker charged forward and tossed the ball to Brennan, who immediately began sprinting towards the end zone that had been carefully marked out using plastic cups. Booth took off after her and was surprised at how quick she was. She had taken off her heels for better mobility and was now flying down the field. He upped his pace and began closing the gap between them. "You better watch out, Bones," he said as he neared.

She glanced at him over her shoulder, grinning like a fool, and he felt a matching grin spread across his face as he reached his arms out and grabbed her around the waist, pulling her to abrupt halt. She went flying backwards, but he quickly angled his body so that she would land on him instead of the ground. They tumbled to the grass, breathless and laughing. She landed with a thud against his chest, giggling and still clutching the ball in her arms. He let out a dramatic groan, but he was more than happy to take the hit. "You okay?" he asked as she rolled off him.

"Yeah," she said, turning her head to smile at him. "Thanks for catching me."

"My pleasure."

"Bones!" Parker yelled, sprinting over to the scene. "You let him catch you!"

"I did not!" she said indignantly, thunking him on top of the head with the football. "Your father is very fast."

Parker grinned at the compliment to his dad. "Yeah, I know," he said, smiling up at her. "It was a good try, Bones. This time I'll run the ball, though, okay?"

"That's sounds very satisfactory," she said, handing him the ball.

As Booth watched them walk away together, engaged in a very serious conversation about God knows what, he felt a familiar ache return to his chest. "This is happiness," he mumbled under his breath, remembering all those dinners, all those soccer games, all those afternoons at the park when he'd sat beside the two people he loved most in the world and felt like everything he'd ever wanted was within his reach. "This is happiness." And it was as simple as that.

"What?"

He turned to see Hannah standing beside him, looking at him expectantly. "Oh, nothing," he said quickly, shaking himself out of his reverie. "Ready for some more football?"

"Definitely," she said.

He smiled and took her hand, leading her over to where Bones waited with his son.

—BB—

"Bones, you gotta call the play," Parker instructed.

"What should I say?" she asked, staring at the football as if it would provide her with all the answers she needed.

"Just say something that sounds smart," Parker told her.

She nodded and bent into position. "Okay. Maxilla! Phalanges! Greater right cornu! Lower mandible! Um…"

"Hike," Booth whispered helpfully from in front of her.

"Oh, right." She took a deep breath. "Hike!"

Parker immediately charged away, calling for the ball, and Hannah went after him. Brennan took a couple steps away and cocked her arm. She was just able to throw the ball to Parker before Booth came barreling down on her. He grabbed her waist and pulled her to the ground. She fell to the grass and he landed on top of her, but managed to catch himself on his arms.

She was laughing beneath him, her face flushed and beautiful, her hair messy and more lovely than ever. "Sorry," he murmured. "I didn't catch you that time."

She smiled up at him, her hands pressed to his chest. "I can take it," she told him.

—BB—

Parker stood beside Hannah in the end zone, waiting for his dad and Bones to join them. They were doing their normal thing of staring into each other's eyes like they were looking at the most amazing thing ever. Parker was used to waiting for them. This kind of thing happened _all _the time when they were together. He glanced up at Hannah, who seemed to be extremely alarmed about what Bones and his dad were doing. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," she said and Parker was barely able to conceal his eye roll. She was a _horrible_ liar. Dr. Sweets would be horrified.

"They always do that," he said helpfully.

Hannah turned her wide-eyed stare down to him. "Excuse me?"

Parker shrugged. "They always do that," he said again.

"What? Roll around on the ground together?" Hannah mumbled with barely concealed loathing.

"No," he said. "Just that one other time when me and my dad taught her how to play. But I'm talking about the staring at each other part. They love to do that. I don't really know why," he mused, frowning. "It looks kind of boring, don't you think? I mean, I've seen my dad's eyes and I've seen Bones' eyes and it's nothing special." He shrugged, tossing the ball in the air and catching it easily. "I don't know. Grown ups are weird sometimes."

Hannah nodded thoughtfully and watched as Booth finally rolled away from his partner. "Can I tell you something, Parker?"

"Sure."

"Staring into another person's eyes can be really exciting sometimes."

"Really?"

She nodded. "Like if you're in love with the other person, or you want to kiss them."

"Ew," Parker said, wrinkling his nose in distaste. "I don't think I'll ever like that."

Hannah smiled. "Someday you will, buddy. Believe me."

—BB—

Booth found her in her office, sound asleep on the couch. He shrugged out of his trench coat and wiped the rain from his face before walking over to her, bending close and kissing her soundly. She woke up slowly, her hands reaching toward him. She pressed her palms to his cheeks and held his face. She opened his eyes. "You're wet," she mumbled.

"It's raining," he said and kissed her again.

"Why are you kissing me?" she asked, still sleepy and disoriented, her lips brushing across his slowly.

"Because I want to," he said, wrapping his arms around her warm, languid body. "And because I can."

He watched her carefully. Her face was a breath away and he could tell that she still hadn't quite woken up. He saw the exact moment when she did. Her body tensed, her eyes widened. She pressed her hands to his chest and pushed him away. "What are you doing here?" she asked leaning away, the back of her hand pressed to her tingling lips.

"Hannah and I broke up," he explained calmly. "Three days ago."

She sat up straighter and pulled her knees to her chest. "So?" she said softly.

"So," he said. "I spent the first day feeling guilty, the second missing you, and the third missing you even more." He paused and brought a hand to her cheek. She didn't lean into him, but she didn't lean away either. "You make me happy," he told her suddenly. "You make me happier than I ever thought possible. Did you know that?"

She began to shake her head then seemed to think better of it and looked away. "I don't know if I…I'm not sure if I can do this, Booth."

He had to force the desperation from his voice when he asked, "Why?"

"Because you hurt me. You said you'd never betray me, and you did."

The words stung. They drifted across the space between them, falling like a weight, heavy on his chest. "I told you I had to move on."

"That's not what I mean, Booth," she said. "You said you had to move on and I understood that, but coming back here and brandishing your love for her in my face, ignoring me, cancelling plans with me to be with her…It was like you were a different person. It was like you couldn't stand me, like you _hated _me."

"I did," he said bluntly. "I did. Because I knew that the only person I could be happy with—truly happy with—was you. And by saying no you took that away from me. I could barely bear being near you, because every time I looked at you, I was reminded of what I could've had, what was possible."

He leaned towards her and reached out to wipe away the tears pooling in the corners of her eyes. "I tried so hard to convince myself that I didn't need you. Self preservation, you know? But I don't hate you, Bones. I could never hate you."

"You hurt me," she said softly.

He smiled sadly. "So did you."

She reached for him then and he let her pull him to her. He eased himself onto the couch beside her and drew her into his arms. "Let's not hurt each other anymore, okay?" he murmured.

She nodded. "Okay."

He smiled and kissed her, felt the shape of her mouth and the shape of her body, the way it fit against him, molding to him, soft and warm. She draped her leg across his hips, sighing softly as he pressed his lips to her neck and the hollow of her throat. She let him undo the buttons of her blouse, let him part the fabric and press his lips to the tops of her breasts. "God, Bones," he mumbled, feeling her hands work their way inside his shirt and press against his heated skin.

He lifted his head slightly, just enough to look into her eyes, dark and heavy-lidded with desire. "This is happiness," he whispered and kissed her and felt her smile against his lips.

**I know I say it all the time, but I just love these two to bits and pieces. I could just hug the stuffing out of 'em. And speaking of stuffing: HAPPY THANKSGIVING! I know what I'm thankful. Yep, you guessed it—Booth's chest. Hehe. **

**Review please!**


	8. Idiot

**Another chapter. Yay.**

**On a random (or not so random) note: listen to the song "23" by Jimmy Eat World. It is **_**so **_**Booth/Brennan it's kind of ridiculous. It's like Jimmy was watching the 100****th**** episode as he wrote it.**

She got the call the day they arrested Jimmy Walpert for Harriet's "murder by chocolate" as Booth had come to refer to it. They wanted her to head a second dig in Indonesia. New bone fragments had been found just a few miles from her original dig site on the Maluku Islands and a full-on excavation was being planned. It was the opportunity of a lifetime and two years ago, she wouldn't have considered going. But now…

She said "maybe" and hung up the phone feeling inexplicably lonely.

Booth had told her he'd meet her outside the lab and give her a ride to the restaurant for Angela's "surprise" baby announcement. A year ago, he would've come inside. He would've teased her and helped her into her coat and put his hand on the small of her back as they walked out to his car. But now…

"Hey," he said as she slipped into the passenger seat.

"Hey," she returned as he pulled out of the parking lot onto the road.

She called love an idiot and he got annoyed, like he always did now, no matter what she said. She was getting the feeling recently that he could barely stand to be around her.

"Love is an idiot," she said again, because he'd spent five and a half years proving his love for her, proving that he would never betray her and within the last few months, he'd gone from being everything to barely being her partner. Love was an idiot. She felt like screaming it at the top of her lungs, because how could he love her that deeply and now not even stand to be near her. How could that happen?

Hannah was home from her trip and he wanted to go to her. She said it was fine, she said she's make excuses for him, but she felt like saying to him, "You know that unconventional family you taught me about a few years ago? You're coming dangerously close to not being a part of it anymore."

She felt like saying to him, "You know how you said you'd never betray me? Well, you are, because I don't even recognize you anymore. I feel like I lost my best friend in the whole world."

She didn't say any of those things. She just smiled and said goodbye and called the organizer of the dig to tell him that she was in. She'd fly out tomorrow.

—BB—

As Booth ran through the airport, all he could think about was her high school reunion. All he could think about was the look on her face when those stars dropped from the ceiling and she told him it was like the prom she never had. Sometimes, she was so innocent he could weep.

He remembered smiling and moving into her without thinking, because when she cried, he always held her, but then she was right there, all around him and he could barely think straight. He considered pulling away, but didn't. How could he? How many times was he going to have a chance to slow dance with Bones? How many times was he going to have a chance to hold her close, to _feel _her body moving against him, have her head resting on his shoulder? He barely even allowed himself to touch her anymore for fear that he'd break. For fear that he'd fall to his knees and beg or push her against the nearest wall and have his way with her. That's how close he was to the edge. He'd told her he had to move on and he did, he _needed _to, but he couldn't. It was as simple as that.

But then he'd met Hannah and she'd made him feel good. She laughed at his jokes and understood normal cultural references and didn't launch into lengthy diatribes against religion every time they passed a church. But Bones…Bones was _his. _She was his in this strange way that he could never explain to anyone. She was there, everywhere he turned. In the air he breathed, in the space behind his eyelids when he slept, in his chest, thudding, _aching_ whenever she was near.

The night of the reunion they'd returned to the hotel and went into their respective hotel rooms. It had felt so strange, having her so close then having to leave her in the night. He could taste it that night, what it would be like to have her, really have her the way he wanted so desperately to.

He remembered tossing and turning in bed that night, almost going to her room so many times. He had pressed his hand to the wall and imagined her on the other side, so close and yet so horribly far. The next morning, he woke up early and drove around till he found a decent cup of coffee. She answered the door almost immediately when he knocked, cup in hand, and smiled at him in this oddly shy way that made him want to kiss her. But he didn't. Of course he didn't. "Morning, Bones," was what he said instead.

"Morning, Booth," she returned and for some reason, in that moment, he'd lost her.

—BB—

Brennan had just gotten through security when she heard him: "Bones!" He was calling her name. "Bones!"

She stopped, but didn't turn. She could see her terminal up ahead. She could just walk away. Board the plane and never look back. She could forget him. She _could._

"Bones!"

She turned. He was trying to push his way past the security guards. He was breathless and desperate, fighting them off as they tried to pull him away. "Bones!" he called and she could see the hurt in his face. Even from a distance, she knew what he was thinking. He was the only person she could do that with.

She began to walk towards him, slowly at first, then faster as the guards pulled him away. "Wait!" she yelled. "Wait, let him go. It's okay."

She ran the wrong way through a metal detector and sent it into a beeping frenzy. The guards let him go reluctantly and she flew into his arms. "Booth," she breathed into his shirt and suddenly wanted to cry, because he was here, calling out to her in an airport.

"Bones," he whispered into her hair, his voice gentle.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

He pulled away and looked into her face, saw the tears perched just behind her eyelids. "Isn't it obvious?" he asked. She shook her head. She wanted to hear him say it. He smiled. He lifted his hand to her cheek. "I couldn't let you fly halfway across the world."

"Why not?" she asked, dropping her eyes from his face to his chest. She watched her own fingers toy with the fabric of his shirt. She had to hear him say it.

"Because I can't live without you," he told her.

The tears slipped from the corners of her eyes and for the first time in her life, she didn't feel weak for crying; she didn't feel embarrassed for falling apart. She just felt safe, standing there in his arms as the world rushed past. "I didn't want to go," she admitted. "But I…I missed you."

He smiled, a little sadly, down at her face. "I know."

"You were right there, next to me, but…" She shook her head and searched his face. "You were gone."

"I was momentarily lost," he told her. "But I think I'm back on track now."

She smiled through her tears. She wished he would kiss her. "I'm glad you're back."

He nodded. "Me too."

He began to lean towards her, his arms tightening around her waist, but she stopped him. "Wait," she murmured. He pulled back slightly and met her eyes.

"You okay?"

"Don't ever hurt me again."

He nodded. "I won't. I promise."

She nodded and closed her eyes as he bowed his head forward and brushed his lips against hers. "Love is an idiot," she breathed and he grinned against her lips.

"Nah," he murmured. "It's not so bad."

And as he kissed her again, deep and full on the mouth, right there beside the metal detectors, she thought that maybe he was right. Maybe it wasn't so bad after all.

**I hope everyone's Thanksgiving was awesome and I hope you enjoyed the fluff! Review please!**


	9. Game

Hannah walked into the bedroom, pressed a quick kiss to his lips, and moved away towards the bathroom, already slipping out of her jacket. Booth remained in the bedroom, sitting on the edge of the bed. "What did you mean the other night when you said you couldn't imagine going from being a woman to being a mom?"

"What?" she called back distractedly. "I don't know."

He could hear the sound of running water as she turned on the faucet, a splash as she washed her face. "I just want to know what you meant," he told her. He knew he sounded a little harsh, but the comment had been bugging him ever since the night they had dinner at Bones' apartment.

She appeared in the door, patting her face dry with a towel. "I think it's pretty self-explanatory, Seeley," she said.

He shook his head slightly and clasped his hands in front of him. "I don't think it is, actually."

She leaned against the doorjamb and frowned. "I just meant I can't imagine going through that. Gaining all that weight, losing my figure, the stretch marks. Trading in late nights on the town and sex for breastfeeding and changing diapers." She shrugged. "I like my life the way it is, you know? I like feeling sexy and putting on make up to go out. I don't want to be tied down like that."

Throughout her speech, he remained motionless, perched on the edge of the bed. He didn't nod or react. His gaze remained passive. When she finished, he took a deep breath and gave her a long, appraising look. "You do realize that being a mother and being a woman are not mutually exclusive, right? In fact, I would argue that being a mother makes a woman even more feminine and beautiful."

"Okay," she said slowly, looking at him strangely. "I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree."

She began to move away from the doorway, but he stopped her. "Hannah." She turned. "What about Parker?"

She frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, what about Parker? You can't be with me without being with him. If we're together, you're going to have to be a part of his life. You're going to have to go to the soccer games and recitals and graduations. You do realize that, don't you?"

"Yeah," she said vaguely. "Sure."

He sighed. "What I mean is, you have to really _do_ this. You have to be in it. You have to commit to being 'tied down' as you so delicately put it."

"Seeley, I…"

"Tell me you're in it," he said softly. "Tell me you won't walk out this door the next time you get offered a job halfway across the world. Tell me this all hasn't been a game. Tell me you're not that selfish."

She moved into the room and crouched down in front of him. "It wasn't a game. I do love you, Seeley. But I…I can't promise that I'll be here forever. I can't…"

"What?"

"I can't promise how I'll feel a few months from now or a year from now or three years from now." Her tone was gentle.

He gave her a wry, ironic smile. "You and Bones really are similar, you know that?"

She shook her head. "I don't know what that means."

He laughed a low, bitter laugh. "Exactly."

She sighed and bowed her head forward. "I've actually been meaning to talk to you about something."

"What is it?"

"I got a job offer. In India."

"Doing what?" he asked.

She smiled sadly. "Does it even matter?"

He shook his head. "No, I guess it doesn't." He reached for her hands, gathering them between his own. "You're taking it," he said. It wasn't a question.

"I'm sorry," she told him. He could tell she was.

"I know."

"You weren't a game, Seeley," she told him again. "And neither was Parker."

He nodded. "Alright."

"I did love you," she promised and the verb tense didn't escape his notice.

He nodded. "So did I."

—BB—

A few weeks later, Booth sat across from Brennan at the diner, holding the letter she had handed him only a moment before between shaky fingers. "Africa, huh?" he murmured, setting the letter down between them. His eyes fell to the table. His chest ached. "That's great, Bones," he said softly. "That's really great."

"I'm not going," she told him.

He looked up at her. "What?"

"I'm not going," she said again. "My life is here now. With Angela and Hodgins and Cam and Sweets and Parker." She smiled slightly. "And you."

He swallowed past the tightness in his throat. "But, Bones, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity."

She nodded. "It is," she agreed. She glanced at the letter, then back at his face. "But so is this." She reached across the table and took his hands. Gripped them tightly. "I learned that the hard way, Booth. I thought I'd missed my chance. I don't want to make the same mistake twice." She smiled at his awestruck face. "I don't want any regrets."

Impulsively, he lifted her hands in his and kissed her knuckles. "Thank you," he breathed softly. She smiled as he lowered her hands to the table, his thumb absently tracing patterns across the smooth skin. "Do you want to go for a walk?"

—BB—

"You've changed," he told her as they walked arm-in-arm through the park.

She nodded. "I have."

"It was that night in the car, wasn't it? You were different after that."

"My world was turned upside down," she said. "I thought that I'd be able to adjust. I thought that I'd be able to go back to the way it was before, but I never really did." She paused, looking thoughtful. "Something happened to me that night, Booth. It was as if a door was opened and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't shut it again. Sometimes, I really wished I could."

They came to a bench and sat down on it. He wrapped his arm around her waist and she leaned into his side. "I realized my mistake. I realized how I…felt about you. It was even worse punishment than the confusion and emptiness that preceded it, because now I was aware of how lonely I was."

"Ignorance is bliss," he supplied.

"It is."

He let out a long breath and turned towards her. "How you've been feeling for the past month? That's how I've felt for six years."

Her face fell. She leaned into him, suddenly wanting to touch him, suddenly wanting to wish away all those wasted years. "I'm so sorry, Booth."

He shook his head and lifted his finger, gently evening out the lines of worry that had worked their way into her forehead. "I'm glad you're here, Bones," he told her, hoping she knew what he meant.

She smiled and leaned towards him. "I'm glad I'm here, too."

Her lips were soft and hesitant as they brushed against his, gently at first and then with increasing sureness. He ran his hand up her arm to the back of her head, cradling her mouth against his, his fingers slipping between the strands of her auburn hair. When they broke away, she bowed her head forward and he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. "You're nothing like Hannah," he breathed, so softly that the words were lost to her, even though she felt the shape of them as his lips moved against her skin.

"What?" she asked, pulling away to meet his gaze.

He shook his head. "Nothing," he told her. He kissed her nose. "I love you," he told her like he'd been saying it everyday for the past six years. Maybe he had.

She smiled. "I love you, too."

**Okay, so that was cute, right? I knew I had to do something about the most recent episode, but I couldn't bring myself to face it head on. I honestly die of sadness every time I think about that scene in the car and Brennan's admission that she feels sad. God, Emily kills me. Emmy anybody? **

**So anyway, this was my roundabout way of dealing with it. I hope you liked it! **

**See that button down there? Press it! :)**


	10. Mistletoe

**For Christmas, I bring ya'll the gift of fluff.**

Bones had been distant all night. Ever since the night in the car, she'd been more withdrawn, more careful, more quiet, but tonight it was like she couldn't even look at me. We were all sitting in Hodgins' giant living room, complete with a fireplace and a flat screen television that took up a whole wall. Parker was talking a mile a minute, explaining the latest experiment that Max had set up for him. Angela and Hodgins were listening intently, Max was helping out by supplying words like "hydrochloric" and "potassium nitrate", Hannah was on her blackberry, and Bones was sitting on the edge of the couch. She was looking right at Parker, nodding along, laughing at all the right times, but I could tell she was a million miles away. Her eyes had faded some in the past few weeks, but now they looked downright empty. She was sad—I could see it—and for the first time since we'd been partners, I couldn't just go over and hug her and make it all go away.

For one, there was Hannah. She still didn't know the extent of my relationship with Bones, how close we'd been once, so I didn't think she'd be thrilled if I went over and hugged her. Plus, I had a nagging suspicion that _I _was a big part of why she looked so heartbroken, so it wasn't like I could make _that _go away.

When Parker finally finished his epic blow-by-blow of the experiment, Bones stood, gathered some plates, and made her way into the kitchen. I quickly finished my drink, grabbed Hodgins' empty glass, and hurried after her. She was standing in front of the sink, washing a plate when I found her. "You know they have a dishwasher, right?" I said.

She glanced at me and smiled. "I know. I just needed to get away."

I walked over and stood beside her. "Mind if I join you?"

She looked at me then—actually studied my face—and I got the feeling that maybe she didn't want to be near me right then, that maybe I was the very thing she needed to get away from. But then her eyes softened slightly and she nodded. "Okay," she murmured and turned back to the dishes.

We washed in silence for a long time. She washed plate after plate and handed them to me one by one to be dried. Her motions were mechanical and careful—I could tell she was barely focusing on what she was doing. Her gaze remained focused on the sudsy water; her eyes had that distant look to them that I had gotten used to. "Parker's really wonderful, Booth."

The sound of her voice was so unexpected that it almost didn't register above the rushing water. "Yeah, he is," I said, feeling that familiar smile tug at my lips, the one that only came when I thought about my son.

"Do you think that you and Hannah will have kids someday?"

I swallowed and focused on the plate in my hand. "I, um, I'm not really sure. We haven't really talked about it." I paused and gave her a sideways glance out of the corner of my eye. "I think she mentioned she might want to adopt one day."

"That's a nice idea," she said. "There are many children in the world in need of a home."

She didn't say anything more after that and I suddenly wished desperately that she would talk to me, that she would confide in me the way she used to, without hesitation, without reservations. "Why do you ask?" My voice was softer now, gentler. I had moved another step closer to her without really realizing.

"I've been thinking about having a baby," she told me bluntly. It occurred to me that she hadn't looked me in the eye during this whole conversation.

"Oh," I breathed. "Just…by yourself?"

"Why not?" she said with a shrug. "Women do it all the time nowadays."

"Right." For some reason, I had the overwhelming urge to beg her not to do it. "So you'd just…go to a sperm bank and pick some random guy to be the father of your child?"

If she detected the bitterness in my tone, she didn't comment. "Yes. It wouldn't be right for me to use your sample now."

I nodded. "Right."

She went back to washing and I was left feeling like something irreplaceable at just slipped through my fingers. I turned towards her and looked at her. Studied the silhouette of her beautiful face, from her sad eyes to the curve of her lips. "Wait," I whispered, the word slipping from my mouth before I could hold it in.

She stopped. She put down the plate she'd been holding and turned to me. "What?" she breathed.

"Just wait, okay? Don't do it like this, Bones. Not like this."

"What other way is there, Booth? For me?"

I shook my head. The urge to touch her was so overwhelming that I had to clamp my elbows into my sides to keep from reaching for her. "Just wait, Bones. Please?"

"Wait for what?"

"For…" I trailed off and lifted my hand. Let my fingers brush the soft skin at the inside of her wrist. "For me," I breathed.

She sighed. She closed her eyes. She leaned towards me almost imperceptibly. I was torturing her, I knew, and it was unfair and cruel and I couldn't help it. She'd tortured me for years. "Booth…"

"Hey, guys, what are you doing in here? Parker's all ready to open presents."

I glanced towards the doorway where Hodgins was standing, looking confused. Bones had already moved away, turning back towards the sink to discreetly swipe a few stray tears from her eyes. "Yeah, um, we'll be right in," I said, my voice thick.

Hodgins nodded and walked back down the hall. Beside me, Bones let out a long breath. "We should get in there," she said, already moving away.

"Bones—"

She paused and looked at me. "They're waiting, Booth."

I caught up with her in the doorway to the living room and grabbed her by the elbow, pulling her to a stop beside me. "Bones, I think we need to—"

"Dad! Bones! Look! You're under the mistletoe!"

I glanced over at Parker, then up at the green leaves dangling over my head. "Oh," I mumbled.

"You have to kiss now!" my son announced excitedly. "Those are the rules, right Max?"

"Yes, I do think your son is right, Booth." _Thanks, Max._

I looked at Bones who was determinedly keeping her gaze focused on her shoes. I thought I could see a hint of pink blooming in her cheeks. "Those _are_ the rules, Bones," I said, choosing not to look at my girlfriend who was sitting a few feet away. "Bones?"

When she finally lifted her head and met my eye, I was surprised to see anger brewing in her gaze. "On the cheek," she instructed softly.

I nodded, leaned towards her, and was surprised when, a moment later, my lips landed on hers. I had been aiming for her cheek, but somehow in the breath between nodding and leaning into her, my mind had shut off and my heart had taken the lead.

At first, her lips were stiff and unmoving, but after a few seconds, she relaxed into me. I felt her give in, felt her shift towards me, her hand drifting up to press against my chest. Surprisingly, I felt no guilt at all, only an odd sense of homecoming as I parted my lips and felt her tongue meet mine. She tasted like wine and cinnamon and Bones and I suddenly knew that I loved her more than I could ever love the woman sitting a few feet away. Bones had me, she'd always had me; no one else ever could. I wanted to have a baby with her, I wanted to spend my life with her, I wanted to spend the next thirty or forty or fifty years trying to convince her that love was real.

After an amount of time that could've been seconds or minutes or hours, we finally pulled apart, our lips separating with an audible pop. We didn't look away from each other. The room was absolutely silent. My arms were still wrapped around her waist; her hands still rested gently against my chest. Her lips were slightly swollen, her hair a little disheveled, but what I noticed first were her eyes. They were bright and blue and beautiful. They were the eyes I remembered.

"Hi," I breathed.

"Hey," she whispered back, her voice husky and slightly wondering.

I knew I should say something. I knew I should step away and release her, but I didn't want to. I had the sudden, irrational wish that we could stay like this forever. It was Parker who finally stepped forward and broke the spell, calling me back to the reality. "Dad?" he called. "Can we open presents now?"

With some difficulty, I tore my gaze away from Bones and focused on my son. "Um…"

"Hey, Parker, why don't you come look at my bug collection. I just got some new shipments from Africa that I think you'll like."

"Cool!"

I shot Hodgins a grateful smile as he led my son away.

"I need a drink," Max breathed. He downed the scotch in his glass and moved towards the kitchen for a refill.

Then, suddenly, Bones was pulled from arms as Angela leapt up and took her hand, mumbling something about colors for the nursery. I crossed my arms against the chill her sudden absence brought and turned to Hannah.

She was sitting on the couch, her expression guarded—impassive almost. "Well," she said quietly, dropping her gaze to the carpet. "I guess I can say with some certainty that this relationship is over."

The guilt that had evaded me as I kissed Bones was now descending on me, swift and overwhelming in its strength. "Hannah—"

"It's funny, because I could almost see this coming. I part of me has always known that I would never be enough for you, that you would never love me as much as I love her."

"Look, Hannah—"

"But the _really _ironic thing is that I was going to break up with you tonight."

I froze. Frowned. Blinked at her a couple of times. "What?"

"I was going to break up with you," she said bluntly. "I got a job offer in London and I'm going to take it."

"Oh."

"But this still hurt, Seeley," she said. "I mean…that was a low blow."

I didn't even attempt to defend myself. What was the point? "I know."

She nodded and stood up. "You know," she said, her tone suddenly light—teasing almost—as she made her way over to me. "In a movie, this would be the part where I slapped you and called you a jerk."

I nodded. "That sounds about right."

She smiled and her gaze was surprisingly loving, surprisingly forgiving. I suddenly remembered why I fell in love with her. "But I'm not going to do that."

"No?"

She shook her head. "No. I've never liked being a cliché."

"You're anything but a cliché," I promised her.

"So let's not be a cliché, okay? Let's just call this what it is, just break up and go our separate ways, no worse for wear."

I gave her a wry smile. "_No_ worse for wear?"

"Well," she amended, "maybe a _little _worse for wear."

I nodded. "Okay." She smiled and moved away. Picked up her purse and walked towards the door. "Hannah?" She turned. "I am sorry."

"I know you are."

—BB—

I found everyone in the kitchen, sipping drinks and laughing over Parker's Spongebob impression. As soon as he saw me, he charged over and I scooped him up into my arms. He was starting to get a little too big for it, but for some reason, in that moment, I needed to hold him. "When can we open presents?" he asked.

"Right now," I told him. "Why don't you go with Angela and Hodgins and Max and get started and I'll be out in a second."

"Cool!" he said, grinning.

I set him down on the ground and he charged back into the living room. As Angela moved past, I caught her eye and she pointed down the hallway. I turned and walked over to the door she had pointed out, knocking softly. "Come in," came the answer from within.

I pushed open the door and found her sitting in the middle of an empty room. "What is this room?" I asked, eyeing the bare walls and hardwood floors.

"The nursery," she said.

"Cheery," I commented, taking a seat beside her.

"Angela was showing me a couple of possible colors for the walls," she explained, her voice soft—dreamy almost.

I nodded and waited for her to continue. When she didn't, I moved closer and slipped my arm around her waist. She leaned into me immediately, resting her head on my shoulder. "You okay?" I asked, turning my lips into her hair.

"You kissed me," she said.

"Yes."

"In front of Hannah."

"Yes."

"Why?"

I sighed, feeling ashamed. "I don't know."

She lifted her head and looked at me. "Really?"

"I wanted to kiss you," I confessed. "But it wasn't the right time."

She seemed to agree that this was true. "Are you and Hannah…?"

"We broke up."

She nodded and looked away, towards the white walls. She seemed immensely unsure and confused. "Are you…sad about that?"

I thought about explaining how guilty I felt, how complicated it was, how I _was _sad in some way for hurting Hannah, a woman I had loved in some way. But I knew that wasn't what she was asking. "I'm happy, sitting here with you."

"You are?" she asked, a smile spreading across her face.

I nodded. "I am."

She leaned into me and I lifted my hand to her face. Tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Trailed my fingers over her shoulder and down her arm. When our lips were only a breath apart, she paused. "I'm happy too," she told me and pressed her lips to mine.

Outside the door, just down the hallway, our friends were sitting around the fire, opening presents and laughing. In a moment, we would join them. But for now, I relished the feel of having Bones in my arms, the feel of this new, fresh future and knew I was exactly where I was supposed to be.

**Okay, so a little corny, but I blame Christmas. All this holiday cheer is ruining my writing. Lol. **

**And I know that some of you might have some objections to Booth kissing Bones in front of Hannah. I didn't actually think I was going to do that, but it kind of…write itself that way. I know, lame excuse, but it happens sometimes, and when it does, I don't question it. **

**Anyway, either way—like it or hate it—press that button and let me know! **


	11. Tree

**Merry Christmas everybody! Finish off the day with some fluff. :)**

The knock on her door came halfway through a documentary on the migration patterns of sperm whales. She got up from the couch and walked over to the door, swinging it open. Before she could even register who her visitor was, something small and solid collided with her legs. "Bones!" Parker greeted her happily, hugging her waist.

"Hey, Parker," she said, hugging him back. "What are you doing here?"

She glanced behind Parker, expecting to see Booth waiting in the wings, but her hallway was empty. "Where's your father?" she asked curiously, wondering how the little boy got here.

"He's in the car," Parker explained hurriedly. "I'm supposed to get you. He wanted to come, but I told him I could do it myself." When Brennan didn't immediately confirm his statement, he added indignantly, "I _am _ten, Bones."

"I know you are," she said, smiling. "I'm sure you handled yourself very well."

"I did," he confirmed. "I even shook your doorman's hand the way my dad does."

Brennan nodded her approval. "Well done."

Parker's grin was wide as he looked up at her. "So you ready?"

"For what?" she asked, realizing she still didn't really know why he was here.

"For tree shopping," he told her. "_Duh._"

"Tree shopping?" she repeated, still confused.

"Yeah, you're coming with us to pick out a tree." When she still didn't move from her doorway, he sighed and took her hand, dragging her back into the apartment. "I'll help you get ready," he announced. "Dad told me to tell you to dress warmly because it's cold." He stopped in her living room and glanced back at her. "Do you have earmuffs?"

—BB—

Booth smiled broadly as Brennan opened the passenger door and slid into her usual seat beside him. "You made it," he said happily. "And you have earmuffs!"

"Parker told me to dress warmly," she explained.

Booth turned in his seat to wink at his son who had settled into the backseat. "Good job, bub."

"She was just going to wear jeans, but I talked her into snow pants," he said seriously.

Booth turned back to his partner. "You really need to wear snow pants when you pick out a Christmas tree, Bones," he told her seriously.

"Why? There's a fine selection of trees just around the corner at the shopping center—"

Booth held up a hand to cut her off. "The shopping center? You're joking, right?" She gave him a look like she thought he'd gone insane. "Booth men never buy their Christmas trees pre-cut. Right, Parks?"

"Right!"

"Wait," she said, her tone dubious. "You're going to cut down your own tree?"

Booth grinned. "That's right, Bones. And _you _are going to help."

—BB—

Booth stepped out of the car and inhaled deeply, letting the smell of pine trees and fresh snow flood his senses. "Isn't this great?" he mused, running his eyes across the tree-spotted hillside.

Brennan glanced at him standing in the snow, hands on hips, chin held high. He looked like a lumberjack in his boots and jacket, broad-shouldered and strong-armed. Despite herself, she felt a wave of warmth sweep through her that had nothing to do with the layers of clothing Parker had instructed her to wear.

Parker hopped from the backseat and came to stand beside his father, adopting the same wide stance. "Ready, dad?" he asked.

Booth looked down at his son and smiled. "Definitely." He bent down and adjusted Parker's hat, pulling it down over his ears. "You warm enough?"

Parker rolled his eyes. "Yes, dad," he said.

Booth raised his hands in surrender. "Just checking."

Parker just rolled his eyes again and ran off towards the trail leading up the hill. Booth walked over to Brennan and stood in front of her. He reached out and adjusted her hat, just like he'd done with Parker. "You warm enough?" he asked, his voice suddenly soft and low.

She nodded, feeling both thrilled and confused at his attentions. "Yes."

"Good," he said with a nod. "Let's go pick out a tree."

—BB—

After tramping along the path for a solid hour, scanning the trees for the perfect pick, Brennan grew more and more grateful for the extra layers Parker had talked her into. As the sun sank lower in the sky, the temperature dropped significantly until their breath was coming out in white puffs. Booth suggested tree after tree as they walked along, but Parker turned down every one.

"Too fat," he would say, shaking his head.

The next was too skinny; the one after that wasn't tall enough. They reached the end of the trail close to sunset and Parker still hadn't found a satisfactory choice. Brennan took a seat on a rock near the path and a moment later Booth sat beside her. "He's very picky," she said, smiling.

"He is," Booth agreed with a good-natured sigh.

He rested the saw he'd been carrying on the ground and much too Brennan's surprise, wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "You're getting cold," he said knowingly, eyeing her slightly blue lip and red nose.

She shrugged. "I'll be okay," she said, but Booth shook his head and stood up, offering his hand to her.

"C'mon, Bones," he said, when she didn't immediately take his proffered hand.

She gave him a suspicious look, but finally let him pull her to feet. "My mom used to do this when Jared and I would come in after playing in the snow all day," he explained, unzipping his coat. "She wore these incredibly soft, warm sweaters and when we came inside, frozen to the bone, she'd pull us close and wrap us up in them."

As he talked, he wrapped his arm around her waist and tugged her closer. She resisted at first, but eventually gave in and leaned into his warm body. As soon as she was pressed close to him, he wrapped his jacket around her shoulders, creating a cocoon of warmth around her. Despite her slight unease at the incredible intimacy of the situation, she felt herself relaxing against him, her arms tucked under her, her face pressed to his chest.

"Mmm," she hummed appreciatively as the chill in her body gradually faded away. "Thank you, Booth."

"No problem," he murmured and she could hear the smile in his voice.

She lifted her head to look at him, a question stirring in her eyes, but was interrupted by Parker bounding up to them. She pulled away automatically, crossing her arms over her chest as the warmth of his body was replaced by cold air.

"Dad!" the little boy announced excitedly. "I found the tree!"

"Great!" Booth exclaimed enthusiastically, jogging after his son as he disappeared into a cluster of trees.

Brennan followed and, a few moments later, came to a halt beside Booth. Before them stood one of the saddest looking trees that Brennan had ever seen. It was thin and scraggly, with a crooked trunk and a dismal number of branches. "This is the one?" Booth asked doubtfully.

Parker nodded. "Definitely."

"Can I ask why?" Booth questioned gently.

"Because it's small and ugly," Parker explained matter-of-factly.

Booth frowned. "And that's why you want it?"

He nodded again. "No one else will want it. All of its friends will get cut down and brought home where families will decorate them and put presents under them, and it will stay here, all alone." He turned to his dad and Booth felt like his heart would burst. "I want to give it a chance to be a Christmas tree too."

Booth nodded. "Okay, buddy," he said, his voice thick. "It can be our Christmas tree."

Parker grinned. "Thanks, dad."

Brennan watched as Booth bent down and set to work sawing through the tree's thin trunk. Despite herself, she felt moved by the whole thing. "This is a really nice thing to do, Parker," she told him sincerely, her throat tight.

He looked up at her, shrugging nonchalantly. "I just thought it deserved to be a Christmas tree too even though it's not perfect."

She nodded. "I agree."

—BB—

Half an hour later, in the dim light of dusk, they arrived back at the car. Booth went off to pay for their Charlie Brown tree and Brennan stayed by the car with Parker. "I'm glad you're here, Bones," Parker said suddenly.

Brennan smiled. "Me too, Parker."

"Hannah was cool," he continued, "but I think I want my dad to marry you, not her."

Brennan blinked down at the little boy, then over at Booth, who was waiting for the tree to get wrapped in plastic netting. She swallowed and managed to cough up her voice. "Hannah and…your father…th-they…"

"You okay, Bones?" Parker asked, frowning at the stuttering anthropologist.

Brennan shook her head, feeling strangely numb. "They…broke up?"

Parker nodded. He didn't look too sad about it. "A couple weeks ago."

"Oh," she said softly. She thought back to two weeks ago, trying to remember if Booth had seemed different, but nothing stood out.

"You okay?" Parker questioned again, peering up at her pale face. "You look a little weird."

Brennan swallowed. "Yeah I…I'm fine," she said, managing a tight smile. "Why don't you get in the car and get buckled up. It looks like you're dad is almost done."

—BB—

Brennan was quiet the entire ride home. She kept her face turned towards the window and despite Booth's attempts at conversation, the car ride was spent in relative silence between the partners while Parker filled the gaps with stories about his day and detailed descriptions of every single ornament he was planning on hanging on the tree.

When Booth reached Brennan's apartment building, he stopped the car and turned towards her. "Can I walk you up?" he asked hopefully.

"No, I'll be fine," she mumbled, barely glancing at him as she pushed open her door and stepped out onto the street.

Booth sighed and leaned back in his seat, following her progress as she walked up the path to her building. She was about to walk inside when he pushed open his door, gave Parker hasty instructions to stay put, and ran after her. "Bones, wait," he called, and despite herself, she did.

"What is it Booth?" she asked, still not meeting his eye as he jogged up to her.

He let out a long breath. "I just…Is something wrong?"

She shook her head. "No."

"Stop lying to me," he said, but it came out more like a plea than an order. "Just…tell me what's bothering you."

She sighed and crossed her arms over her chest before finally meeting his eye. "You broke up with Hannah," she said bluntly.

He swallowed and nodded. "Yes."

"Two weeks ago."

"Yes."

She shook her head at him and her look of frustration melted away into one of confusion. "Why didn't you tell me?" she asked softly.

"Bones," he began, but she cut him off before he could continue.

"No, Booth. I just…I thought we told each other everything. I thought we had no secrets. I thought…" She trailed off and glanced away, her eyes shimmering with tears. "I don't know what I thought."

They stood there in silence for a long time. He knew what she needed to hear, but he didn't want to open that door just yet. In time he would tell her why he broke up with Hannah. In time he would tell her that he loved her more than he could ever say. But for now, he just wanted to be with her, to stand next to her, hug her maybe, and let her know that he was still her friend. "Bones," he murmured softly, moving closer.

She lifted her head and looked at him. She was still confused, he could tell, and maybe a little hurt, but when she saw the look he was giving her, gentle and loving and filled with undeniable devotion, her expression softened. "Yes?"

"Come back to my apartment and decorate a tree with me." She smiled slightly, but didn't immediately reply. "I'll make you hot chocolate," he added enticingly.

Her smile spread into a grin. "With marshmallows?"

"Of course," he said.

"Okay," she told him, "I'll come."

He nodded and offered his hand. She hesitated for a moment before reaching out, slipping her fingers between his, and following him back to the car.

—BB—

When Booth emerged from Parker's bedroom, he found Brennan sitting cross-legged on the couch, hot chocolate in hand, admiring the tree. He took a seat beside her, resting his arm against the cushions behind her back. To his surprise, she shifted closer, leaning into his side. "This is one of the best trees I've ever seen," she said.

He nodded, and turned his eyes from her face to their skinny, wisp of a Christmas tree, carefully decorated with ornaments and lights. "It is pretty great," he agreed.

"Parker's asleep?" she asked.

"He was out the second his head hit the pillow."

She turned towards him and he turned towards her. He watched as her eyes fell across his face and over his outfit of sweatpants and a t-shirt, to the mug in her hand and the tree in front of them. He saw the exact moment when the intimacy of the evening, the domesticity of sitting on the couch after putting his son to bed hit her. She moved away from him. "I should get going," she said and her voice had lost its softness.

She stood and put her cup down. He stood too, but she didn't look at him. She was spooked. "Bones?" he questioned gently, moving into her.

She tensed and immediately crossed her arms over her chest. "I have to go," she said softly.

"You're scared," he said.

She looked at him. Met his eye and shook her head. "I'm just…tired," she mumbled, the lie ringing hollowly between them.

"You're wondering why I didn't tell you that I broke with Hannah," he said and knew he was right when her gaze skittered away from his face. "You're wondering why I didn't come to you. You're wondering why I brought you to pick out a tree and why it felt so good when I held you to keep you warm. You're wondering why I wanted you to decorate the tree with us and why you leaned into me when I put my arm around you and why you don't want to leave and why not wanting to leave scares you so much."

She shook her head again, but didn't even try to contradict his words. She bowed her head forward and he heard her sharp intake of breath, saw the tears slip from the corners of her eyes. "Why did you break up with Hannah?" she asked softly.

"Because I realized that I loved you more," he told her simply. "Because I realized that you…you have me, Bones. You've always had me."

She nodded slowly and wiped at her eyes. He could see how badly she wanted to believe him. "Then why didn't you tell me that you broke up?"

He smiled softly and lifted his hand to her cheek, brushing away the remnants of her tears with the pad of his thumb. "I didn't want to be the guy who broke up with a girl just so he could be with another one. I didn't want you to be the rebound. I've waited so long for this and I just…I wanted it to be…ours." He paused and searched her face. "Does that make any sense?"

She nodded. "Yes."

He smiled and reached for her. Wrapped her in his arms and felt the way her body relaxed into his. "Will you stay with me?" he breathed into her neck. Now that he had her in his arms, he couldn't bear the thought of her leaving.

She nodded, her face hidden against his chest. "Yes."

—BB—

She followed him into his bedroom and watched as he opened his dresser drawer and handed her an old pair of flannel pajamas. A few minutes later, as she stood in his bathroom, slipping out of her clothes and pulling on pajama's that smelled like Booth, she had the strangest feeling of being in a dream. She felt safe and warm and…right in a way that she hadn't in a long time.

But when she stepped out of the bathroom and found him standing in front of her, his eyes soft and dark as the earth, she was reminded that this wasn't a dream. She was here. In Booth's bedroom. In Booth's clothes. He was all around her and she wouldn't have it any other way. She moved to him and pulled her into his arms wordlessly.

She sighed as his lips found her neck, his hands slipping under the hem of her shirt and running across her skin. "God, you feel good," he murmured appreciatively. And she did. Still fully clothed in baggy pajamas and she looked more beautiful, felt better than any other woman he'd had in his arms.

She made a sound that was somewhere between a sigh and a moan and he felt as if he could come undone just from this. Just from the feel of her hands against his chest, her body against his body, her lips soft and sweet as she kissed her way along his jaw. This, _just this_, was all he needed.

After a while, he pulled back slightly. She tipped her head up towards him and parted her lips in anticipation as he bent towards her. When her lips were just a breath away, he paused. Heard her little sigh of desire. Kissed her cheek and the corner of her mouth. "You sure?" he asked softly, his lips ghosting across her cheek.

She nodded and shifted closer to him until she could feel the length of his body all along hers. "I'm sure," she promised and smiled when he kissed her, his mouth warm and familiar against hers.

Kissing her was everything he remembered. Her lips were soft, her breath sweet and for the first time in seven years, he took his time. He kissed her slowly, slanting his mouth across hers again and again, until she began to grow restless in his arms. He let her pull his t-shirt up and over his head. Let her explore his chest and back, her fingers moving across the smooth muscles.

He began to unbutton her shirt, but grew impatient halfway down and simply pushed the loose garment from her shoulders, letting out a heartfelt groan when he found her bare underneath. He drew her close again. Found her mouth with his as their naked chests came together.

They kissed for a long time like that, both reveling in the closeness of the moment, skin-to-skin, heart-to-heart. When they finally pulled away to catch their breath, he wrapped his arms around her waist and hugged her to him. She rested her cheek against his chest, her head tucked under his chin, and breathed in deeply. She had always loved the way Booth smelled—a clean, heady scent that reminded her of fresh water and the outdoors, but she never got more than a whiff of it during the day. Now, standing in his arms, his bare skin under her cheek, she closed her eyes and reveled in the smell.

When he adopted a similar position, burying his nose in her hair, she was glad she had remembered to put on perfume before Parker dragged her out of her apartment. "You smell so good," he told her, his voice muffled against her neck.

"Mmm," she hummed, pressing a kiss to his chest. "So do you."

He pulled back and smiled at her and the thought suddenly crossed her mind that she hadn't felt this loved in a long time. "Thank you, Booth," she told him.

"For what?"

"For…" She trailed off, searching for the right words. "For being my friend," she said finally.

He nodded and pressed his lips to her forehead. "You're welcome."

—BB—

For the first time in as long as he could remember, Booth woke up before his alarm. He glanced over to where Brennan lay beside him. She had fallen asleep in his arms, but had shifted away during the night and now, unable to resist, he rolled towards her and draped his arm across her waist, tugging her back into his chest. She sighed softly, but didn't wake up, and he tightened his arms around her, loving the way she felt in his arms, how right it was to wake up beside her.

For a while, he simply lay beside her and watched her while she slept. Ran his hand along her side before settling his palm over her stomach. Kissed her neck until she stirred in his arms. He watched as she opened her eyes, wondering for a split second if she would freak out. But she didn't. She just nestled back against him and closed her eyes again, a soft smile settling across her sleepy face. "Morning," she murmured, running her hand along the arm that was resting across her waist.

"Morning," he returned. "How do you feel?"

Her smile widened and she turned in his arms so she could meet his eye. "Happy," she told him.

He grinned and kissed her lips. "Me too."

She shifted closer and draped her leg across his hip, locking their bodies together. He groaned softly and this time his kiss was deep and searching. "I love you," he said softly, the words that he had kept in for so long suddenly slipping from his mouth.

She stilled in his arms, but didn't pull away. "What?" she breathed.

He let out a long breath. Lifted his hand to her cheek. Prayed she wouldn't run. "I love you," he said again. He held her eye when he said it. Made sure she knew he meant it.

"I…" She trailed off. Her eyes were bright with fear and something else…something softer.

"It's okay, Bones," he soothed. "You don't have to say anything."

"No, I…I want to say…something, but I…" She shook her head, dropping her eyes from his face.

"But you're scared," he supplied gently.

She nodded, her eyes filling with tears. "I've been scared for so long, Booth," she confessed, her voice shaking around the words.

He nodded and pulled her closer and was relieved when she relaxed into him. "I know," he murmured. "It's okay."

"Would it be okay if I…waited for a little?" she asked nervously.

He smiled was wide and loving. "Of course. Take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere. I promise."

She nodded. "Okay." She was quiet for a moment as she studied his face, the strong line of his jaw and the stubble lining his cheeks, the lines around his eyes and his messy hair. "You really love me?" she asked, her voice soft and wondering.

He nodded and kissed the tip of her nose and her lips. "I really do, Bones."

"Okay," she breathed and in that moment, looking at her beautiful face and her beautiful eyes, so trusting and so lovely, he was suddenly sure that she loved him too. He knew that, in time, she would tell him, but for now he was content to simply lie there holding her.

**So this is officially the longest chapter in this series by far. I wanted to give you guys some epic Christmas fluff complete with cuddling, love confessions and Parker cuteness! I hope ya'll enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it and if you did, you know what says thank you like nothing else? REVIEWS! **


	12. Real

**Hey, ya'll. So I'm back. Sorry it took a while, but I think you'll understand why when you read this one. It's freakin' epic. Sixteen pages. The longest one-shot I've ever written. I'm in love with it and I hope you will be too!**

**Oh, and just for the sake of full discretion: I shamelessly stole a scene from the show **_**Alias **_**for this story. Anyone who watched the show will recognize it immediately. **

It had been eight days. Eight days since he'd last heard her voice. It was hard to admit how many times he'd thought of her in the past week, when his thoughts should've been completely and wholeheartedly focused on the beautiful, blonde, often naked woman in his bed. It was hard to admit that he hadn't had the courage to call her.

Leaving her so quickly after that night in the car must've felt like abandonment to her, like running away. He'd wanted to say something before he left with Hannah, but in the end, he'd never found time. He'd told himself that he'd call and check in with her while he was away, but in the end, he'd chickened out. What was he supposed to say? He'd had the horrible, sinking feeling lately that they wouldn't be able to recover from this. A part of him didn't want to make her wait around, watching him with another woman. A part of him didn't want to torture her like that. He knew how it hurt. But a larger part of him couldn't bear the thought of not being in her life. And so here they were, in this strange, infuriating limbo once again, right where they'd been for the past six years.

As Booth strode into the Jeffersonian and made his way towards her office, Sweets' words from over a year ago echoed in his mind: _it's like you two missed your moment. _At first, he hadn't wanted to admit to the truth of the statement. He'd always liked to think that they'd just never _reached _their moment. But nowadays, he was finding Sweets to be maddeningly correct.

As he neared her office, he told himself they would get past all of this. He told himself he would make it better. He would walk in, say, "Hey, Bones," and smile at her. She would smile too and stand and he would hug her. And it would be just the same as it always was.

But when he reached her office, he realized his plans were futile, because Bones wasn't even there. In fact, it looked like she hadn't been to work in a while. The room was dark, her desk neat and unused, her laptop missing.

Frowning to himself, he backed out of the doorway and made his way over to Angela's office. He found her at her computer, focusing intently on whatever was on the screen. "Hey, Ange," he called from the doorway. "Have you seen Bones?"

She didn't respond right away. A moment passed and Booth wondered if she had heard him. He was about to call out to her again when she finally lifted her gaze to his face. He was surprised to see anger brewing in her gaze as she stood and walked over to him. "She's at the hospital," she informed him.

Booth froze. He tried to swallow, but found he couldn't. "Is she…" He knew he needed to ask the question, but the words stuck in his throat. Maybe he didn't want to know the answer. "Is she…okay?"

Angela let him stew in his own terror for a minute before nodding her head. "She's fine," she confirmed.

He let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. "What happened?"

If it was possible, Angela's expression seemed to darken even more. "Her dad had a heart attack," she told him. "You weren't here."

The words were so cruel, so brutal, so _true,_ that Booth actually took a step back as if he could escape his own guilt. "What hospital?" he asked.

Angela swallowed and didn't answer him right away. She was hesitating and it killed him. Had he really hurt her that badly? So badly that he wasn't the one she turned to anymore? So badly that seeing him might break her heart even more? "Georgetown," she said after what seemed like a lifetime.

And as he walked back to his car he realized that he would've driven to every single hospital in the greater Washington area just to make sure she was okay.

—BB—

Booth pushed open the hospital room door and found Brennan sound asleep, curled up in a chair beside her father's bed. _Oh, Bones_.

Max was on the bed, hooked up to about ten thousand machines and looking pale as a ghost. Booth immediately walked over to his partner and crouched on the ground in front of her chair.

Ever so gently, he reached out and brushed a loose lock of hair behind her ear. Slowly, she opened her eyes. Slowly, she took in his face, his presence in front of her. She reached out and rested her hand on his cheek. He watched, still as a statue, as the ghost of a smile stirred in her eyes. He was about to open his mouth to say something when she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his in the most gentle, achingly sweet kiss he'd ever experienced.

"Bones," he breathed softly, part hesitation, part invitation.

She kissed him again, deeper this time, and he found himself giving in to the unimaginable softness of her lips, the intoxicating feel of her mouth against his. "I'm sorry," she whispered, her lips brushing across his cheek. "I've just missed you so much."

He let out a long breath, feeling the spell of her taste and touch fade slightly. "Bones, we can't do this," he murmured, true regret stirring in his eyes.

"Why not?" she asked, drawing him close again. "It's a dream. I can do whatever I want."

He pulled back then, his brow furrowing in confusion. "A dream?" He shook his head slightly. "No, Bones, this isn't a dream. This is real."

She frowned. "It is? Then…how are you here?"

The question was so truthful, her face so confused that he felt tears rise in his throat. She thought that the only way he could be standing in front of her was if they were caught in a dream. "Bones," he breathed, his voice rough. "Angela told me what happened."

"And…you came?"

He nodded. "Of course I came."

She smiled slightly at that, but then, as she realized what she had done, the smile faded, replaced by embarrassment. "I'm sorry I kissed you," she told him, her voice soft and tinged with shame. "I shouldn't have. I should've realized…"

"Bones," he said gently, resting a hand on her arm. "It's okay." She nodded, her gaze drifting over to the bed where her father lay. "I'm so sorry, Bones," he told her, following her gaze

She nodded again, distractedly, and stood from the chair, moving over to the bed. "We were going to do New Years together," she said softly. Booth stood and moved closer to her, standing at her back as if he would shield her from the grief. "Russ was going to bring the girls and Amy and I were going to cook a big dinner."

"You still will," he said, even though it was something he had no business promising. "He'll wake up and you'll have your dinner."

She was quiet for a long time, her body tense. He could tell she was barely holding herself together. "He might die, Booth," she breathed, her voice thick with tears. "He might actually…die." Her voice trembled and shook, catching on a sob on the last word.

She turned away from the bed and from Booth, lifting a hand to cover her eyes, but then he was right there and there was no hiding. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and she turned into him, pressing her tear-stained face to his chest. He hugged her tightly, fiercely, as if he would absorb her grief, her pain, if he only held her close enough.

They stood there for a long time, hugging by the bed. When they finally pulled apart, he leaned back into her and pressed his lips to her forehead. "It's going to be okay," he told her. "You're going to be okay."

She lifted her gaze to his face and he could see the sadness in her eyes, the loss. But there was something else, something familiar. It was trust. He realized that, even after everything, she still had enough faith in him to believe it when he told her it would be okay, even without an ounce of proof.

"Why didn't you call me?" he asked her.

She shrugged, her eyes dropping to the floor. "You were with Hannah."

"I would've come," he murmured.

Her face was doubtful and it broke his heart. "Really?"

"Of course. I'll always come for you, Bones."

She nodded. "Okay," she said softly.

—BB—

It was close to midnight a couple days later when Booth heard the knock on his door. He jogged out of his bedroom, swung it open, and found Bones standing on his doorstep. "Bones," he said, feeling a smile tug at his lips at the sight of her.

"Hi," she said, a little shyly.

"Hey," he returned. "You okay?"

"Russ made me go home to sleep," she explained. He didn't respond right away, sensing intuitively that there was more to the story. "So I…I went home," she continued uncertainly. "But I couldn't sleep and I was wondering…" She trailed off, her eyes dropping to the floor.

"Bones," he murmured gently. "What is it?"

She lifted her gaze and met his eye. Smiled slightly and opened her mouth to speak, only to be cut off by a voice calling from the bedroom. "Seeley, who is it?"

He paused and watched her grow visibly tense in front of him. He silently begged her not to run. "It's Bones," he called back, without taking his eyes off his partner's face.

He wanted to tell her not to go, but she was already backing away, her face a mask of apologies. "I'm sorry," she said softly as she moved away. "I shouldn't have come so late…I was just…" She shook her head and turned away, hurrying towards the elevator.

Before he could think better of it, he pulled the door closed behind him and hurried after her. "Bones, wait," he called.

She turned to look at him, her finger already pressing the call button. "Just forget it, Booth," she said, visibly frantic now. "I shouldn't have come."

He reached out and stilled her fidgeting hand, drawing her finger away from the wall. "Bones, hey," he said, his voice soft. "It's okay." He kept his gaze steady on her beautiful, weary face, her dark eyes and pained expression. "Why did you come here?"

She hesitated. "I just…I couldn't sleep and…"

He trailed his hand down from where it still rested on her arm and laced his fingers with hers. "It's okay," he soothed.

"I—"

_Ding!_

The sound of the elevator arriving seemed to snap her back to reality. She pulled her hand from his grasp and rushed onto the waiting car. She kept her eyes on the floor as the elevator doors began to slide shut, but at the last minute, lifted her gaze and met his. "I'm sorry," she breathed and then she was gone.

—BB—

Hannah was just dozing off again when she heard the front door open. She sat up a little in bed, following the sound of his footsteps as he made his way towards the bedroom. She smiled at him in the dim light when he appeared in the doorway. "Is everything okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, I…It was just Bones and she…"

"Is she okay?" she said, her brow furrowing.

"Yeah, I mean, no…not really. Her dad had a heart attack and she…" He trailed off and shook his head slightly.

"Seeley," Hannah said softly, drawing his distracted gaze to her face. "Is something wrong?"

He kept his eyes on her for a long time, his gaze dark and appraising, as if he was warring with himself over a difficult decision. "I think I'm going to go see if she's okay," he said finally.

Hannah nodded. "Okay. That's fine."

Her answer seemed to surprise him. "Really?" he questioned.

"Of course," she assured him. "She shouldn't be alone right now."

He smiled then, his face softening. He suddenly remembered all the reasons why he fell in love with her. "Thanks, babe," he whispered, leaning in to give her a kiss. "I'll see you in the morning, okay?"

"Okay."

—BB—

He didn't bother knocking. He knew, somehow, that it would be open. When he walked through the door, he was met with darkness. The only light he could see was coming from down the hallway, streaming out in a thin shaft beneath the bathroom door. He walked over and knocked on it softly. "Bones?" he called. No answer. He could hear the shower running. "Bones?"

He pushed the door open a crack. "Bones? You in here?"

"I'm here." Her voice floated to him from behind the shower curtain.

"You okay?" Silence. The sound of the water sounded unnaturally loud to his ears. "Bones?"

"I'm here."

He frowned at the thin whisper that was her voice. Unease swept through him. Pushing aside his hesitancy, he moved into the bathroom and pulled back the curtain. She was curled up in a ball beneath the spray, shivering as cold water hit her pale skin. It suddenly didn't matter that she was naked and he had a girlfriend and he had been in love with her for so long. She needed his help. In that moment, it was all he saw. "Bones, this water is freezing," he said, alarmed at the sight before him. Her blue lips and raw, icy skin.

He turned off the spray. Grabbed her towel off the rack. Bent down and wrapped it around her trembling shoulders. He urged her into a standing position and slipped his arm around her waist as she stepped unsteadily from the tub. "We need to get you warm," he murmured, rubbing the towel along her arms, trying to coax the warmth back to her skin.

"It's fine, Booth," she protested dazedly as he ushered her into her bedroom and sat her on her bed.

"No, Bones, it's not fine." He pulled open her dresser drawers until he found the one containing her pajamas. He grabbed a pair at random and turned back to her. "It's not fine, okay?" he murmured fiercely not really knowing what he meant, but knowing he didn't just mean her body temperature.

She looked up at him, her blue eyes soft and tired and so trusting. Still so trusting. He bent down in front of her and took her cold hands between his own. "I'm going to stay with you tonight, okay?" he told her.

"You don't have to," she said, but she seemed relieved at his announcement.

He smiled and kissed her forehead for the second time that day. This time, he let himself linger for a moment, his lips brushing her skin, his nose pressed to her wet, sweet-smelling hair. "I want to," he whispered. "I want to stay with you." And he did. So badly.

—BB—

Within a few minutes, Brennan was fully clothed in warm pajamas and tucked safely into her bed. Booth still floated around the room, returning her towel to the bathroom, gathering the clothes she'd discarded earlier and tossing them in the hamper. She listened with her eyes closed as he moved around. His footsteps were comforting to her. Even though she knew intellectually that she was still awake, she had the strangest sensation that she was dreaming. The whole day felt like a dream. As if she hadn't yet woken up from her nap beside her father's hospital bed. She was still in a dream where she could kiss Booth because she missed him and go to his apartment to ask him to sit with her while she slept.

The scientist in her suspected that this was her mind's way of coping with grief. To quietly bow out, leaving her in this strange, foggy limbo between reality and sleep. There was a word for this, she knew. What was it? She felt sluggish from her toes to her brain. She couldn't think. There was a word. What was it?

"Dissociation."

At the sound of her voice, Booth turned towards her, abandoning the pajama drawer he was trying to tidy. "What?" he murmured quietly. He crouched down beside the bed so that his face was level with hers. "Did you say something, Bones?"

She blinked at him sleepily. "Dissociation," she said again.

He frowned, reaching out to run his finger along the curve of her cheek. "I don't know what that means," he told her. He looked sad and it suddenly seemed very important to explain to him exactly what she meant.

"It's the…the…" She trailed off and closed her eyes, willing the words from her hazy brain. She took a deep breath. "It's the…disruption of the normal…integration of a person's conscious or…or psychological functioning."

His frown deepened. "I don't know what that means," he murmured again.

She smiled thinly. "That's supposed to be my line."

He smiled too and resisted the urge to kiss her again. "Go to sleep, Bones."

She didn't need to be persuaded. She let her heavy eyes drift shut. "Thanks, Booth," she mumbled.

He leaned towards her and tucked the covers up over her shoulders. He kissed the top of her head. (That was three today, but who was counting?) "Goodnight, Bones," he murmured, even though she was already asleep.

—BB—

It was early, early morning when she woke up. The sun hadn't risen yet and the light had a dim, gray quality to it. She opened her eyes and immediately felt a smile touch her lips. Her partner had dragged the rocking chair from the corner of the room over to her beside and was now sound asleep in it, his head lolling to the side, soft snores emanating from his partially open mouth. She reached out and touched his thigh. "Booth."

He woke up quickly, his gaze going directly to her face. "Bones?" he mumbled hoarsely. "You okay?"

"You could have slept on the couch."

He smiled. "I know," he said, a little defiantly, and she could see the silent plea in his gaze. _Please, let me take care of you._

"Okay," she whispered.

He smiled and stretched, repositioning himself in the hard, wooden chair. "Can I ask you something?" She nodded and he was suddenly struck by how beautiful she looked lying there in her bed, warm and languid, hair disheveled, eyes bright and sleepy. "Why did you let the water get so freezing last night?"

As soon as the words left his mouth, he could see the tension seep back into her body. He wished he hadn't asked. He liked her like this, all relaxed and sleepy and lovely. "It started out warm," she explained. "But then…" Her eyes flitted away from his face. "But then the water got cold and I…I realized the chill was the first, true thing I had felt the whole day. Then I started to go numb and I…" She met his eye. "I liked that, too. I _needed _that, too."

He nodded. "I can see that."

"You can?" she asked.

"Yes," he told her.

"Does Hannah know you're here?"

The question was so sudden and his thoughts were so very far away from the woman he claimed to love that the effect was a surge of guilt, deep and sudden and shocking in its strength. "Yes," he said quickly—too quickly. "She told me to come."

When he saw the hurt flash across her face, he regretted the words instantly, especially since they weren't exactly true. She sat up in bed and he could almost see the walls going back up. "Well, don't do me any favors," she told him.

"Wait, Bones," he said, standing as she slipped out of the bed. "I didn't mean—"

"Go home, Booth," she said. She sounded weary.

"But I—"

"Just go," she said again, this time louder—harsher. He took a step away from her and she moved past him. "Goodbye, Booth," she muttered and it scared him how sure she sounded, like he'd broken something that maybe this time he couldn't fix.

—BB—

Hannah was in the kitchen getting ready for work when he walked in. As soon as he stepped through the door, she walked over and wrapped her arms around him. "Good morning," she murmured into his ear, so soft, so easy. "How's Temperance?" she asked, pulling away to meet his eye.

He smiled gently at the genuine concern in her eyes. She looked so nice standing in front of him, in her pencil skirt and crisp, white blouse. So neat, so together. He couldn't imagine how he looked. Like crap, probably. "She's doing…okay," he said vaguely and kissed her so she wouldn't ask anymore questions.

How could he explain his night with Bones? How could he explain the sound of her broken voice, echoing over the rush of water? How could he explain her dazed expression or the trust in her eyes when they finally cleared and she _saw _him and was _grateful _to have him there, helping her? How could he explain Bones in the morning? The way her eyes seemed extra blue during sunrise, how her skin glowed, how her hand reached out to touch his leg? He couldn't explain those things to the woman standing in front of him. He wouldn't. _What goes on between us should just be ours._ He wouldn't.

"She's strong," he told her softly, his hands running up her arms. "She's a fighter. She'll be okay."

Hannah nodded and pressed one more, light kiss to his lips before moving away. "I have to go to work," she said, grabbing her purse and coffee mug off the counter.

"Will you be home tonight?" he asked as she moved past him towards the door.

She shook her head. Her face was apologetic as she reached for the doorknob. "No, I'm sorry. I'm flying to New York right after work and won't be home until tomorrow afternoon."

For some odd reason that he chose not to overanalyze, he felt relieved. "That's okay," he said. "Jared's been bugging me for a guy's night out, so maybe I'll give him a call."

She smiled. "Sounds good," she said, swinging open the door. "Don't party too hard."

He grinned. "I'll try not to," he called as she pulled the door shut behind her.

—BB—

He expected her to kick him out of the hospital room immediately. He expected her to yell and accuse and push him away. He expected her to hate him, so when he walked into Max's hospital room and was immediately greeted with a fierce hug from his partner, he was surprised to say the least. "Bones," he breathed in surprise, letting out a relieved laugh as she pulled him close.

"He's awake," she whispered into his shirt. She pulled back and met his eye. "He woke up."

Her grin was so wide and so relieved that it made his chest ache. "That's so great, Bones," he told her, his voice thick.

Her smile softened slightly at the emotion in his eyes. She reached down and slipped her fingers through his, tugging him towards the bed. "Come see," she urged.

He followed her over to the bed where Max was lying. He still looked pale and small hooked up to all those machines, but his eyes were open and they were clear. "Agent Booth," he greeted him hoarsely, his voice quiet but clear. "Good to see you."

"You too, Max," Booth told him sincerely. "It's good to have you back."

"It's good…" He had to pause to swallow and take a breath. "It's good to be back."

Brennan's concern was immediate. "Dad," she said softly, resting her hand on her father's shoulder, " maybe you should get some more rest."

"Oh, honey, I'm fine."

"Dad," she said. Her voice was stern, but there was an edge of pleading to it. Booth could see that she was still scared. "Please, rest. For me?"

For a moment, Booth thought that Max might actually be stubborn about it, but then he just smiled and nodded. "Alright. The girls did wear me out a little."

"Russ brought Amy's girls by this morning," Brennan explained to Booth, before turning back to her father. "Sleep," she ordered, but she was smiling.

Once she was satisfied that her father was resting, she took Booth's hand again and led him out to the hallway. He was apologizing before she could even pull the door shut. "Bones, I'm so sorry about last night," he said hastily. "I didn't mean what you thought I meant."

"Booth, it's impossible for you to know what I was thinking. Mind reading is a ludicrous notion."

"Bones," he said seriously. He wasn't going to let her avoid this conversation by distracting him with squint speak. "Hannah didn't _tell _me to go stay with you. I said I was going and she was just being…supportive. That's all I meant."

She nodded, but still seemed to be waiting for something. After a moment of deliberation, he moved closer and pulled her into his arms. She sighed softly, relaxing into his body. He didn't think he'd ever get tired of how this felt. "I _wanted _to be there with you, Bones," he told her quietly. "I _needed _to make sure you were okay."

"Thank you, Booth," she whispered.

He smiled, resting his chin on the top of her head. "No problem."

—BB—

Brennan wasn't surprised when she heard the knock on her door. Maybe she should've been, but she wasn't. Somehow, she knew he'd come. She opened the door and smiled at him. He smiled back, looking almost…sheepish. "I'm sorry," he said, as she stepped aside and let him in.

She closed the door and turned to face him. "For what?" she asked, her expression bewildered.

He opened his mouth to speak, frowned, and closed it again. "I, um…I don't actually know." He thought of Hannah and felt guilty. Maybe his apology was meant for someone else. "It just seemed like the thing to say."

She was utterly bemused. "Okay," she said softly, brow still furrowed like he was a constant mystery that she was always unraveling.

He nodded. "Okay."

"Want a beer?" she asked, moving past him into the kitchen. "I have that kind you like…what's it called?" She opened the door and pulled out a bottle, glancing at its label. "Heineken," she read, turning her attention from the beer back to him.

"Yeah, sure," he said easily. "I could go for a beer."

She handed him his drink and turned back to the fridge to pull out one of those god-awful, foreign beers she liked so much. As if moving with one accord, they drifted over to the couch. He watched her, Heineken in hand, as she sat down and got comfortable against the cushions. Call him weird, but he'd always kind of loved the way Bones sat down onto couches. There was something strangely feminine about the way she curled one foot underneath her and leaned back against the cushions with a light sigh.

"Booth?"

When she said his name, he realized that he'd been staring at her pretty intently for a pretty lengthy period of time. He looked away quickly, willing himself not to blush. "Sorry," he muttered, his second apology in five minutes. "It's just…" He felt his cheeks flame. "It's just you do that well."

"What?" she asked incredulously. "Sit down?"

He shrugged and sipped his beer self-consciously. "Yeah."

She gave him a confused look. "Are you okay?"

He was about to say that of course he was okay, why did she ask? But when he turned back to look at her, the words died in his throat. It hit him, suddenly, that there had never been a time when he'd looked at her and thought that she was anything less than beautiful. At the lab, at the diner, at her apartment. Wherever she was, she stole his focus. He saw her in a way that he didn't see anyone else, through a lens that was colored by his devotion to her.

Then he thought of Hannah. She floated into his mind, blurred and unfocused. He tried to remember the exact shape of her lips, the exact shade of her eyes and found, to his surprise (and guilt, again) that he couldn't. He realized he had never noticed the way Hannah sat down on couches. He had never been speechless in the face of her loveliness. He had never wanted to kiss her as badly as he wanted to kiss his partner right now.

"I kissed you back," he said abruptly.

Now she looked _really_ confused. Confused and maybe a little freaked out. "What?" she asked, as if she wasn't quite sure she wanted to hear the answer.

"In the hospital, when you kissed me, I…I kissed you back."

She nodded slowly and he could almost see the wheels spinning in her head, struggling to catch up to what he was trying to say. "Okay," she said uncertainly. "You kissed me back."

He nodded and leaned towards her without really thinking about it. "You thought it was a dream, but I didn't. I knew it was real and I kissed you anyway."

All at once, the confusion was gone, replaced by something along the lines of fear. "Booth…" Her tone was warning.

He knew the path he was taking and he knew he'd break her heart if he tried to take it back. But he didn't want to take it back. "I kissed you back, Bones, because I…I miss you, too." The words came out in a rush of breath, a sigh of relief. It felt so good to say it out loud. He said it again. "I miss you, too."

"But Hannah…"

He'd told her that Hannah wasn't a consolation prize and he hadn't been lying; she wasn't. She was a good, strong, beautiful woman, a woman he loved in some way. A woman who didn't deserve to be held in second place in his heart. "I love _you, _Bones," he breathed. "I think I've always loved you."

Tears welled in her eyes at his words. "Booth…"

"Don't be scared, Bones," he said quietly, remembering Cam's warning that day in the bar so long ago. _Be sure._ "Don't be scared," he said again. "I'm never going to leave you again."

He wondered, for an instant, if she would understand what he meant. If she would know that he didn't just mean those seven months they spent on opposite ends of the world. But then she nodded and the trust flashed bright through her tears. "Okay."

He leaned towards her. He wanted to kiss her more than he could say, but forced himself to wait, to redirect his lips to her forehead, a spot he was actually growing quite fond of feeling beneath his lips. "I have to go."

"What?" Her eyes were wide. "Why?"

"Don't worry," he breathed soothingly. He kissed the smooth skin at her temple. "I'm just going to go talk to Hannah." She still looked doubtful so he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her onto his lap.

"You know what?"

"What?"

"I want to kiss you," he breathed into her ear and had the pleasure of feeling a shiver scoot up her spine. "I want to kiss you, Bones. I want to do _more _than kiss you. But I have to talk to Hannah first."

"I understand," she said, but didn't make any move to get up.

"Bones?" he asked curiously.

"Can we just…sit here for a while?"

He nodded and tightened his arms around her. "We can stay her for as long as you want."

—BB—

It was late by the time he walked out in the hallway, leaving Bones asleep on the couch. He knew she'd be on the plane by now, already half way to New York, but he couldn't wait. He flipped open his phone and hit speed dial two. It struck him that he'd never switched Bones from his number one spot. That suddenly seemed terribly significant to him now.

As expected, he got her voicemail. "Hannah," he began uncertainly. He thought of her standing in New York, alone on the street, getting this message. It gave him a sad, strangely regretful feeling. "I, um…I need to talk to you, so…" He trailed off. Could he be anymore cryptic? "So, just call me, okay?" He realized how scary this might sound to her. He wanted to say something reassuring, but he couldn't think what. He couldn't tell her that it wasn't anything serious. This was serious. Maybe not in a life-threatening, I'm-in-the-hospital kind of way, but definitely in a major-life-change kind of way. "Just…" He paused. "Come home safe, okay?"

With that, he closed his phone and walked back into the apartment. Bones was still asleep. He walked over, crouching down beside the couch. "Bones," he said softly, brushing the hair from her eyes. "Bones, wake up."

She opened her eyes and looked at him. "Did you talk to her?" she asked.

"She didn't pick up," he said. "I'll call her in the morning."

Was that disappointment in her eyes? He thought so. Sexual frustration? Maybe that one was just wishful thinking. "I guess I'm going to go to bed," she said, sitting up and rubbing her eyes.

He stood too, trailing after her as she walked towards her bedroom. If she thought it was strange that he was following her, she didn't say anything. He paused in the doorway and watched as she pulled a pair of pajamas out of a dresser drawer. Still, she didn't comment on his presence. She simply moved into the bathroom to change, emerging a few minutes later, teeth clean, hair brushed, clad in an adorable pair of pajamas that had little, pink skull and crossbones images printed across them.

The intimacy of the situation flowed over him and into him. He watched as she slipped into her bed with a soft sigh, pulling the comforter up over her stomach. She stopped just short of covering her breasts, and despite himself, he found his gaze being drawn to her chest. The tank top she was wearing was stretched taught across the fullness of her breasts, low enough to give him a nice view of her cleavage. He imagined taking them into his hands. Imagined the sounds she would make. Imagined how she would look at him as he raised her higher and higher with his hands and mouth. Imagined how her eyes would flutter shut just before she shattered, his name a sigh on her lips.

When he finally dragged his eyes up to her face, he found her watching him, her eyes dark and knowing. She knew how turned on he was. She must. She wasn't blind; a quick glance downward would tell her just how much her little pre-sleep ritual had affected him. "Do you want me to go?" he asked, his voice rough and deep.

She didn't answer right away. She kept her eyes on his face. He could see the lust brewing in her gaze. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, she reached a hand towards him. Without hesitation, he stepped forward and took it, easing onto the bed beside her. She turned towards him as he lay down, scooting so close that he could feel the heat of her body. Their hands, still joined, rested between them.

They kept their eyes on one another for a long time. He studied the face he already knew so well, and found that it was no less beautiful than he remembered. After a while, their breathing began to even out and deepen. He could practically feel sleep descending over them. The world stilled and quieted. Their eyes drifted shut.

He slept a deep, heavy sleep. Bones drifted in and out of his dreams, constant and true and _his_. And when he woke up the next morning, he found that they had barely moved the whole night. She still lay on her side, her face serene in sleep, her body curled towards him. And between them lay their joined hands, bridging the gap between them, their connection just as sure and strong as ever.

—BB—

As soon as she saw his face, she knew. She didn't know how, but she just did. And when he didn't come to her, didn't take her into his arms and tell her how much he'd missed, she was sure. "You're breaking up with me," she said.

He looked a little surprised at her blunt statement, but recovered quickly. He seemed to debate what to say for a minute. Finally, he simply said, "Yes."

They were both silent. He took a step towards her and stopped. "I want to explain."

She shook her head. "You don't have to."

"Hannah…"

"A part of me always knew this might happen," she said quietly and then paused. Was that true? She thought for moment. Yes, she finally decided, it was. "You're in love with Temperance."

"I'm in love with Bones," he said. He stressed the distinction between the names as if they were two different people. Maybe they were.

She realized, suddenly, how little she really knew about the woman. Booth never talked about her much. He seemed…protective of her in a way that had always struck Hannah as odd. Perhaps this was the reason. "Well," she began, then stopped.

She knew there were all sorts of things she was supposed to be feeling right now. Anger. Hurt. Jealousy. Good, old-fashioned betrayal. But instead she just felt numb and maybe a little sad. "I guess I'll go," she murmured, already turning away.

"Wait, Hannah." She turned back. "I just…I'm _sorry,_" he breathed, his voice full, his eyes regretful and so sincere.

She nodded. "Me too."

—BB—

He found her at the lab, in the bone room, bent over a set of remains. He paused in the doorway before she noticed him and took his time to drink in the sight of her. Long legs, slender ankles, slim waist, gorgeous breasts, full lips, soft hair. _Perfect_. The word floated through his mind as he admired her. _So beautiful, _he thought dreamily and then decided to voice the words.

"You're beautiful," he told her simply, honestly.

She looked up at him and smiled. "Hi," she said, a little shy, a little…not.

He began to move towards her. As he walked, she let her eyes rake over his body. She'd seen him naked once, and close to naked a second time. She could picture the perfectly defined muscles, the smooth, broad plane of his chest that lay hidden beneath that crisp, white, button-down shirt. He smiled as he neared, enjoying her unabashed appraisal of his body.

"I talked to Hannah," he said when he reached her.

She moved into him, smiling. "Good," she said simply. "So kiss me."

And so he did. Right there in the bone room, surrounded by history—theirs and others too. Her lips were soft, her kisses demanding and he thrilled at the thought of being able to do this every day. Of being able to wake up to her and fall asleep to her every, single, damn day of his life.

When they finally pulled away, they were both breathless and flushed and grinning like fools. She leaned into him and closed her eyes. "Is this a dream?" she asked softly.

"No way, Bones," he said. "This is real."

**So. Epic, right? You love me, right? Reviews are amazing. Just saying. **


	13. Love

**Two things: One, thank you to ellevee for pointing out that I not only shamelessly plagiarized **_**Alias **_**in my last chapter, but I also shamelessly plagiarized **_**Grey's Anatomy. **_**Apparently, I have no original thoughts. Lol. Two, for those of you who have been reading my fic "First a Dream", I'd just like to say that I'm working on the next chapter and it should be up soon. **

**Okay, now on to the fluff! **

"Seeley?"

Booth glanced up from the morning paper towards Hannah. "Yeah?"

"I…I think we need to talk."

He bristled immediately. She could see him tense visibly as he leaned back in his chair, setting his coffee mug down on the table. "About what?" he asked softly.

"Well, for a long time now, I've been feeling like…" She trailed off, her eyes falling from his face to where his hands were clasped in front of him. She reached out and rested her palm over his interwoven fingers. "I feel like you're conflicted about something."

"I'm not conflicted," he said quickly, a little too quickly.

"Seeley."

He sighed and pulled his hands out from under hers. "Is this about Bones? I told you that nothing is going on between us. Whatever I felt for her…" He shook his head. "It's over. I don't feel anything anymore."

"I think that might be the problem," she told him gently.

"What might be the problem?"

"You don't feel anything anymore."

"Hannah, what are you talking about?"

"I think that maybe…" She paused, hesitant to share her thoughts with him.

"Hannah, _what?" _he asked, his expression guarded and a little heartbroken.

She reached out and grabbed his hand again. He sighed and looked away from her. "I think that you were in love with Temperance. And I think that she broke your heart. And I think that you _needed _to be in love with me to prove to yourself that you could be happy without her, but…"

"But what?" he mumbled, still not meeting her eye.

"But I think that in order for you to be in love with me, you needed to become this whole new person, because the person you used to be was all about loving her."

"Hannah…"

She ignored him, forging ahead unsteadily. "But I…I think that by closing yourself off from who you were—who you _are_—you closed yourself off from the part of you that could love."

"But I'm in _love _with you," he said and she suddenly realized that he really believed that—he really believed that he was in love with her.

"No you aren't," she said. There was a strange, melancholy confidence about her words. "You love _her._"

"But, Hannah—"

"Seeley, think about it. Think about her. Am I really the one you love the most in this world?

"I love you," he said softly. He glanced down to where their hands were still clasped together. "I do." He let out a long, shaky breath. When he spoke again, his voice wobbled. "But I love her, too."

"You love her _more_."

He looked up at her. "Why are you doing this?" he asked. "I would've stayed with you. I would have stayed with you for as long as you would have me."

"Because I _saw _it, Seeley. I saw your love for her and it…it took my breath away." She smiled at him. "She's my friend, too. How could I deny my friend and the man I love such staggering happiness?"

"You love me?"

She nodded and leaned forward, pressing her lips to his forehead. "I do." She pulled back and smiled. "You're a good man, Seeley Booth."

"And you're a good, kind, beautiful woman," he murmured, pulling her into him for a hug.

As she relaxed into him, felt his arms around her, his warm hands and broad chest, she felt a pang of regret sweep through her, fleeting and soft. But then it was gone and she was okay and happy and…free.

—BB—

"Hannah broke up with me."

The words tumbled from his mouth as soon as she opened the door. She frowned at him and he slumped against the doorjamb, letting out a tired sigh. "She broke up with me," he said again. "I'm…I'm…" He sighed. "I'm sad."

Her frown deepened. She crossed her arms over her chest. "She told me she wouldn't do that," she said, her voice surprisingly hard.

For the first time since showing up at her door, he looked at her face, really _looked _at it. She was angry, he realized, as he took in her knitted brow, the firm line of her mouth, the cool, blue of her gaze. "Are you…" He trailed off. He was stunned. "Are you…angry?"

"Yes," she said. "I'm _very_ angry."

He was bewildered. _"Why?"_ he asked.

"I told her you would give her your heart and I asked her not to commit to you unless she was just as serious about you." She paused to take a breath and shake her head. "She lied," she declared, indignant and angry and _wonderful_. "I knew you'd give yourself to her and I knew it'd break your heart if she left." She sighed and reached out. Took his hand and lifted her gaze to his awestruck face. "I didn't want that to happen to you, Booth. I'm sorry it did."

"Bones," he breathed, wanting to laugh and cry all at once. "I…I _love _you."

Now it was her turn to be stunned. "What?" she whispered.

He moved into her, pulling her from the doorway and into her living room. "I love you," he said again, wrapping her in his arms. "I…love you the _most_."

"Booth, I…I don't know what to say."

"Don't say anything," he told her softly. "Just…just be here with me."

She nodded gently and pulled him closer. Slipped her arms around his waist and rested her head against his warm, firm chest. And as he held her in his arms, smelled her smell, felt her body against him, he felt something shift back into place. It felt like coming home and he suddenly realized what Hannah had meant. _Him_, who _he _was, was all about loving Bones. He was _good _at it and he _liked_ doing it.

He didn't know exactly when it had happened, but somewhere along the way, Bones had become a part of him, a part of him he couldn't live without. He needed her, in all the right ways. "Thanks, Bones," he whispered into her hair.

"For what?" she asked.

"For being patient," he said. "For waiting for me."

"You waited for _years_, Booth," she said, pulling away so that she could look into his face. "You were _so _patient with me."

He smiled. "You were worth it."

For one, fleeting moment, he saw regret stirring in her eyes, but then it was gone, replaced by a smile. "So were you."

—BB—

"I missed this," Booth murmured.

She smiled and nodded. "Me too."

They had been sitting on the couch for hours now, talking and laughing and getting reacquainted with what it felt like to be together again, to be _them _again. They had barely touched after his spontaneous hug by the doorway. They sat on opposite ends of her couch, facing each other, their legs stretched towards each other across the cushions. Every once in a while, he'd rest his hand on her leg, gently stroking his fingers across her ankle. His movements seemed almost unconscious and it suddenly struck her how hard it must've been for him to keep from touching her for all these months.

"Booth?" she asked.

"Yes?"

"You said you were…sad. Before, when you showed up you said…you said you were sad. Do you…" She trailed off. Her gaze was uncertain. "Do you have…regrets?"

He tilted his head to the side, his expression thoughtful. After a few minutes of silence, he set down his beer bottle and scooted towards her on the couch. She watched as he lifted her legs and rested them across his thighs, before slipping his arm around her waist and pulling her onto his lap. She tensed slightly at first, but quickly relaxed in his strong, sure hold. "Yes, Bones," he admitted. He rested his hand on her thigh and lifted his gaze to her face. "I have regrets."

She swallowed. "About…Hannah?"

He shook his head. "About you, Bones."

She nodded. "What kind of regrets?" she asked, not quite sure if she wanted to hear the answer.

"I regret not telling you how I felt sooner. I regret all those years I spent denying what I felt about you and all those years I refused to face it." He paused for a second, his grasp tightening around her. She leaned closer, curling into him, her head coming to rest on his shoulder. "You said you're biggest regret was turning me down," he continued, his voice soft and low. "Do you know what my biggest regret is?"

"What?" she breathed.

"Not fighting for you," he told her. "You said that you couldn't change. You said you were a scientist and that you didn't have an open heart and I…I just gave up. I told you that I _knew_, right from the beginning; I told you that I would love you forever and then the next words out of my mouth were 'I have to move on.' That wasn't fair, Bones. You didn't deserve that."

He paused again and turned his lips into her forehead. She sighed and rested her palm on his chest, right over his heart. "You deserve more than that, Bones. You deserve _everything_. I should've told you that that night instead of giving up. I should've told you that you _had _changed, that I'd seen you change in front of my eyes, that I'd seen you grow into this kind, empathetic, beautiful person with the biggest, most open heart. I should've told you all those things and I…I hate myself for not saying them. I hate myself for letting you fly away to Indonesia when all I wanted to do was beg you to stay with me."

"Booth…"

"I'm sorry, Bones," he breathed, his voice thick. "I'm so sorry."

"Booth," she said again. "It's okay. It's _okay._"

"No, Bones, it isn't."

She lifted her head from his chest and put her hands on either side of his face, forcing him to meet her eye. "It _is_, Booth," she insisted, her voice soft and filled with conviction. "Because we're here now. We made it. That's all that matters."

He still looked doubtful so she leaned down and pressed her lips to his, in a soft, whispering kiss that left tears in his eyes. "We made it," she breathed into his lips. "And I…I love you, Booth."

"You do?"

"Of course, Booth," she whispered fervently. "Of course I do."

"I love you, too, Bones."

"You already told me that," she said.

"I wanted to say it again." He paused. "Is that okay?"

She was quiet, considering. "I guess so," she said slowly, a soft smile spreading across her face. "Actually, I think I…kinda like it."

He grinned. "You do?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I'm…I'm not scared."

His expression softened. "Don't be scared, Bones. Don't ever be scared because you think I don't love you."

"That's not what scares me, Booth," she told him quietly. "I'm more scared of depending on someone, of needing someone the way I need you. I'm used to being alone."

He smiled sadly. He kissed her lips and her nose. "I need you, too, Bones. And that's okay. It's okay to need someone and it's okay to be scared."

"Really?" she asked, her expression uncertain.

"Of course."

"Thank you, Booth."

"For what?"

"For understanding me. For knowing me." She paused and smiled. "For loving me."

He grinned. "My pleasure, Bones. My pleasure."

**Yay! Another happy ending! I love it. Review please!**


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